Page 24 of Trusting You
Instead of adding anything more, I watch her tear off pieces of her pancake and put them near Lily, whose tiny hands enclose like they’re squishy toys.
Lily shoves a piece into her mouth, most landing on her lap.
“She can eat that?” I ask.
It takes every effort for Carter not to regard me as an idiot. “She may not have teeth yet, but she can chew. Soft solids, like this, pasta, fruit—”
“Steamed veggies like sweet potato, carrots, pureed broccoli, and cauliflower. I read up,” I say as I finish my bacon, then wipe my hands. “Childcare classes have helped, too.”
“You went to those?” Carter screws up her face like she can’t believe what she’s hearing.
“Yeah, I did.” I try not to but scoff anyway. “I’m not gonna kill her as soon as I’m left alone with her.”
Carter goes pale, and I blow out a breath. Great. I just joked about killing babies before Carter has to leave Lily for good. Excellent people skills.
“That’s not what I mean,” I say. “I’ve done everything I can to educate myself before she came here. You should see my apartment.”
Carter tucks her hair behind her ears. I remember this is how she works through things when she’s nervous or agitated.
I can’t help it. I love how I get on her nerves and agitate her.
Suddenly, I’m hit with a moment of clarity. “How long have you had her for?”
Carter cuts her gaze to me. She knows exactly what I’m asking. “A total of five hours.”
“That’s rough,” I say while looking at Lily, and I mean it.
“Promise me you’ll protect her” Carter whispers it, and I barely catch her meaning. “That you’ll sacrifice everything, do anything, to keep her happy and whole.”
Normally, if some asshole demanded that much of me, I wouldn’t deign with an answer because it’s so obvious. But Carter is about to break apart at her seams. I grab her hand and squeeze, keep squeezing, despite her initial resistance.
When she softens, I say, “With all I am, I will be everything to this child.”
After a moment thick with welling tears, she nods.
Eden approaches, and the second Carter notices, she tenses up at the same time her expression falls.
“We’d better get a cab,” Eden says once she’s at our table. “Get back to the airport and check in.”
“No,” Carter says before she can stop herself.
“Carter,” Eden says firmly. “It’s time.”
“Not yet,” Carter pleads. “It can’t be.”
“The judge has given you a lot of allowances, dear, and so has this young man. It’s time to let her go.”
“I…” Carter frantically scans her surroundings, then looks at me like I have the answers. But, a part of her comes to an understanding, because despite the tears falling, she lands on Lily.
Sniffling, Carter wipes her cheeks with her sleeve. “Lily, honey.”
The baby glances up from the pancake mess at her name.
“I love you,” Carter says. “I love you.”
“Bah.”
“Yes,” Carter laughs, understanding the language even if I don’t. Carter puts her arms around the small high chair, burying her nose in the crook of Lily’s neck.