Page 47 of Trusting You
Lily nabs the cracker as soon as she sees it, and as predicted, her butt stays perfectly still as she turns the food this way and that before shoving it in.
Astor’s shoulders relax. “Thank you.”
This gives Astor the time needed to study the baby in her arms, her gaze feathering across Lily’s lips, to her cheeks, to her lush coat of lashes. Not to mention the frizz ball hair. In those seconds, I see Astor soften, her mouth curve, as she takes in all that she’s related to.
“Wow, Locke,” she says.
“Don’t I fuckin’ know it,” he says, before glancing at me and mouthing an apology. “Still learning how not to curse in front of a baby.”
“Takes practice,” I say. The number of f-bombs I dropped when Lily wouldn’t sleep more than twenty minutes had me sounding like a trucker.
None of us are watching the sea lions anymore, so when they do their finishing act, it goes unnoticed. Astor makes hand motions for somebody to get the baby, because no way is she standing up with one, and Locke swoops in.
We navigate back to the stroller, which is magically still there. Not even any wheels are taken off, and my view of Gotham City is once again turned on its head.
“You going to stay a while?” Locke asks his sister as he straps Lily in.
“I can’t. Have a huge motion due Monday that’s going to take all weekend to write. But I couldn’t stay away,” she adds. “And I’m so glad I finally got to meet her.”
“Maybe longer next time,” Locke says and pecks Astor on the cheek. “Say hi to Mike for me.”
For my benefit, he rolls his eyes.
Astor smacks him on the arm. “One of these days you’re going to have to accept your future brother-in-law.”
“Don’t want to; don’t have to.”
“Stop being such a child.”
“I’m only as old as you are.” Locke grins, then says to me, “We’re twins if you haven’t noticed.”
“No, I didn’t,” I say, and am genuinely shocked.
Astor’s attitude, her gait, her outfit, all scream at me that she’s older. Her eyes alone seem ten years wiser than Locke’s. They lack the spark of humor that Locke’s withstood despite the disappointment in his life. Seem cracked and altered. I wonder what her story is.
“I’m five minutes older. Obviously,” Astor says to me, and it’s the warmest way she’s included me in their conversation. “It’s nice to meet you, uh…Carter. Can we have you guys over sometime? For dinner? I’d love more time with Lily. That is, Carter, if you’re still here with us…”
“Astor,” Locke warns.
“It’s all genuine,” Astor says, flicking a hand at him. “Honestly. You’re invited at any time.”
“Text me your calendar schedule for the next week,” Locke says dryly. “I’ll see if I can fit us in.”
“Don’t be an asshole.” She goes in for a hug. “I love you.” She bends down to Lily’s level. “And, oh boy, have you given my heart a run for its money. You’re adorable. I love you, too.”
I can tell she means it, but it comes off as awkward. Maybe it’s how she hikes her skirt to bend down, or the way she’s balancing in heels. Or how her smile freezes halfway.
She’s unsure how to deal with this new addition but wants to try.
Astor stands and waves her last good-bye. As we’re watching her leave, I say to Locke, “I should get back early. I have to meet the manager of the coffee shop about my paintings soon.”
“Oh.”
It’s almost physical, the way I sense Locke’s disappointment.
“Sure,” he says. “Lily and I’ll hang out here for a while. See if we can spot an awake panda bear. Right, Lil?” He peers over the stroller to catch her eye, but she’s too caught up in the pigeons nipping for stray popcorn kernels beside her.
“Thank you for today,” I say, and like a noob, pat his arm.