Page 33 of Not So Casual
“I’ve been good, actually. What about you?”
“Good. I’ve missed you, though.” Sliding his finger down my chest, I reach out and grab his wrist, stopping him. “We were so good together, what happened?” he pouts. This was the face that sucked me in longer than it needed to, but it doesn’t work anymore.
Elias’ face flits through my mind and I can’t stop myself from smiling. Mistaking my smile for him, Mason steps closer to me and lowers his voice. “You wanna get out of here? We can go back to your place? I’m still wildly flexible.” Glancing up, I lock eyes with Marcus, who’s trying hard to keep from laughing.
Asshole.
Elias flutters into my mind again, and I know without even having to think about it that my answer is no.
“Uh, thank you, but no, thanks. I’m actually out with a friend right now.” Nodding my head, I gesture in Marcus’ direction, hoping Mason takes the hint.
“That’s okay, I can wait.” He rests his hand on my knee, and I jerk it away, not wanting to be touched by him. “Come on, Alex. You know how much fun we have together.”
Rubbing the back of my neck, I look away, trying to decide how to get rid of him. Deciding to just be honest with him and myself, I look into his eyes and tell him a truth that I didn’t realize until just right now. “I’m actually seeing someone.”
“You’re seeing someone?” he echos, disbelief lacing his tone. “You don’t see anyone, Alex. You don’t date. Anyone. Ever.”
Even though he doesn’t deserve an explanation, I still find myself telling him, “I’m seeing Elias. And I’m sorry, but I’m not going to risk that.”
“Elias?” His face contorts as though he’s trying to think of who I’m talking about. “Your assistant Elias? What the hell? What does he have that I don’t?” His face turns red, anger taking over.
“I didn’t mean to upset you. I was just letting you know I’m not available.” I shrug, wanting this whole conversation to be over.
“Whatever, Alex. I guarantee you’ll be calling me in a few weeks anyway.” Mason storms off into the crowd of people, and I can’t help the chuckle that leaves my mouth.
Turning to Marcus, I look at him, wide-eyed. “What the hell was that?”
“First, I never fucking liked that guy.” He points his finger in the direction that Mason just took. “And second… Elias?”
“Yeah. Elias.” I smother a smile by taking another sip of my drink. But obviously, I'm not subtle enough because Marcus smirks at me before a soft laugh leaves his lips.
“Uh huh. I saw that smile. Tell me. I know you’ve had a crush on him for a while. But I didn’t know things would progress from there.”
Scoffing, I roll my eyes. “Men my age don’t have crushes.”
“Yes, you do. You’ve had a crush for fucking ever but were always too scared to try anything. Did you finally build up the courage to pursue things with him?”
“Kinda.” Is it courage I built up? Truthfully? No. Elias is the one who was confident to go after what he wanted. Who knows where we would be if he never had. My heart starts to ache, and I rub at it in circles with my fist. Fuck, I don’t want to think about what might have not happened if Elias wasn’t brave enough to take what he wanted.
“What do you mean kinda? Details man.”
“I’m not sure what to say, honestly,” I admit.
As much as I want to tell Marcus everything that’s happening, I also want to keep it to myself. Usually, I would tell him all the down and dirty details, but telling him about Elias? That just feels wrong. What’s going on with me and Elias isn’t just sex. And as much as I want to push it to the side and joke about it?
I can’t.
“Woah.” Marcus whistles, looking at me wide-eyed in shock.
“What?” I bristle. The way he’s staring at me has me on alert. I’m not sure I’m going to like the next words out of his mouth.
“You love him.”
“What? Pfft. Do not. No way. Nope.” I shake my head adamantly, hoping it gets my point across. He’s ridiculous. There’s absolutely no way I’m in love with Elias.
A hand on my shoulder jostles me and I look up at Marcus.
“It’s okay, ya know. To love him. You don’t have to stay single forever.”