Page 61 of Class Studies

“Ah.” I blinked. “Terrified.”

Livvy frowned and started rubbing my knuckles with her thumbs. “I’m so sorry about my husband and son. Saffron’s so much like his father. He feels deeply, but he gets lost in the logistics. He’ll make an amazing CEO of Gibson Supplies someday.”

I took a few calming breaths and watched Livvy’s thumbs. Her tender and gentle touch warmed my heart and chased away my fear.

“So, you’re not disowning him?” I looked at her hopefully.

Livvy shook her head. “We would never. Saffron’s my baby boy,” Livvy sniffed and let go of my hand to wipe a tear out of her eyes. “Even as a child, he trained to take over for his father. We pushed him hard, both mentally and physically. The mage world, especially for the powerful, is not for the faint of heart. Maybe if I’d been able to give Arthur more kids, we could’ve.…or if I could’ve saved Davin….” Livvy trailed off.

I didn’t know what to say. I spent the evening watching a cold verbal battle of wills between the two men. But this was the opposite, turning my night upside down. Saffron’s mom poured her heart out, and her regret and pain washed over me, touching my very soul.

“I didn’t get much of a childhood either,” I said. Not knowing how to express what I was feeling. “I’m sorry for both of your losses.”

Livvy wiped another tear out of her eye. “Does Saffron talk about his brother?”

I nodded. “A little. He’s too hard on himself.”

Livvy squeezed her eyes shut. For a moment, I thought she was going to fall apart. Instead, she took measured breaths. “We never blamed him, but I think Saffron lived the childhood we never let him have through his brother. When Davin died, something died inside my boy too.”

I squeezed Livvy’s hands this time, and she smiled at me. “But it’s no excuse for what just happened.” She frowned. “I’m ashamed Saffron talked about you like that and more ashamed we’re the ones who taught him to treat life like a negotiation. So, I will ask you again because I know my son didn’t ask; how are you doing?”

I blinked a few times. “Ah, like, in general?”

“With your miscarriage,” Livvy said, squeezing my hands again. “I had three before Saffron and two before Davin, and I was devastated each time. Arthur stuck by me, though his bedside manner is about as good as expected.”

She gave me a small smile, and I returned it. “I honestly don’t know….”

I’m unsure if her raw honesty inspired my own, but I didn’t hold back. I told her every detail of waking up and finding out. Saffron’s devastation and my emotional disconnect. I even described how guilty all of this made me. By the end, we’d moved our chairs side by side, and she wrapped an arm around my tiny frame.

“Saffron says he wants lots of kids.” I ended with. “But at least right now, I can’t even imagine it. Tonight, spending time with the three of you is the first time I’ve ever seen a family together.”

Livvy groaned. “What an example to set.” She rubbed my back again. “I’m so sorry you are going through all of this. I can’t believe how strong you are.”

I wiped a stray tear off my face. “I’m not.”

“You are.” She squeezed me. “The boys have been hovering at the door. Are you ready for them to come back?”

I nodded, feeling stronger even if I didn’t believe her words.

“Don’t just stand there.” Living moved her chair back to her side and waved. “We’ve been waiting for dessert!”

I turned as Saffron, and Arthur’s matching gaits joined us. Saffron scowled at me, making me duck. He said he’d do most of the talking, but I opened up to his mom as easily as she popped wine corks.

I ruined everything.

Livvy cut into her slice of chocolate cake with a pool of very melted ice cream next to it. “Saffron, not that you need it, but you have our blessing to pursue Aphrodite.”

My jaw dropped.

Arthur’s fork clattered to his plate. “Livvy!”

The woman held up her hand to her husband and shook her head. “We have a team of lawyers to smooth things over with the Howels.” She focused on her son. “This is not the dark ages. You’ll be lucky if Aphrodite’s willing to take you back after you treated her like a cow at auction.”

Saffron blanched.

My worry vanished as I shared a smile with Saffron’s mom.

I wasn’t sure if the wine made me light-headed or this odd feeling of belonging, but I took another sip before putting a thick bite of chocolatey goodness into my mouth.