Page 5 of Fixation of the Mind

The silence that followed cut me deep, and my tears began to free fall as each silent second passed. At this point, I was just tired. Tired of the lies, the secrets, and the manipulation, because, when you boiled it all down, that was what it was. Regardless of the reasons behind their deception, they’d put on an act for me, and it had worked.

That thought woke me back up, and I furiously wiped away my tears. I had thought that I would feel better once I got my questions out, but all I felt was lost and alone.

“That’s a lot of questions, and some things are tied to each other. Can we start with the whole Ricci and Ambros thing?” Rion’s low, pensive tone had me nodding my head. I wanted to hear what he had to say. I deserved at least that.

Leaning forward, he blew out a heavy breath before he began to confess. “I'm going to be honest with you, we were planning to keep most of this from you for a while.” My mouth dropped as my eyes flew open, not having counted on him being that honest this early. His jaw clenched, but he pushed his words through it. “We wanted to keep you safe, Rin. That has always been the goal.” He looked at his brothers before wincing. “Well, one of the goals.”

Taking a deep inhale and quick exhale, I pushed forward. “Let's just start with what you and the Riccis are a part of.”

Roux patted Rion on the back like he was trying to comfort him, and Ravi nodded when Rion looked at him, seemingly confirming something. He turned back to me. “We’re a part of a worldwide organization called Foedus.” His lips pinched as he hesitated. “Later, I can go into a long, drawn-out explanation about how the organization operates, but since you’re asking for full disclosure right now, I’ll sum the whole thing up with saying that we kill people.”

My body stilled, eyes zeroing in on his. I was trying to process what he’d just told me. That was not what I was expecting, but thinking about their rooms, this house, and their secrecy, something like that made more sense.

“But why did the Riccis abduct me? Are you guys not working together?” Then something dawned on me, and my heart dropped further than I thought possible. “Does that mean Cin wasn't really my friend?”

Rion raised his hand to stop me from talking, and I frowned, lifting an eyebrow at him. Did he really think he could boss me around right now?

Bowing his head, his eyes flicked to mine, sparkling with a cold, detached blue hue. It reminded me of a tiger showing its belly before coming at you with a surprise attack. “In a weird turn of events, I think that Cinzia actually cares for you.”

What the fuck? Why is that so surprising? Does he think that no one could genuinely care for me?

Ravi quickly cut in, jumping up, waving his hands in front of Rion’s face, panic lacing his voice. “No! No. What he meant was that given our history with the Riccis, he thought that Cinzia was placed as a plant because of our association with you. He was surprised when she helped us find where they’d taken you.” He turned to glare at his brother, who was still facing me with a blank expression. I didn’t think he understood how what he’d said could be taken differently.

“Wait, how did she help you?”

Ravi sat down as Rion's lips pursed like he’d eaten something sour. He looked off for a second before mumbling under his breath, “She gave me clues that she knew only I would be able to follow. That way, she covered her ass with her family while still making it so we could get to you as soon as possible.”

Ravi piped up next. “If her family found out what she did, she would be in deep shit. The Riccis make sure that traitors pay for their crimes. No clean, sweet death for them.”

My jaw dropped as I leaned forward. “Wait. Wait. Wait. Are you saying she could be tortured and killed for helping me?” I thought back to the hooded figure that had given me water and spoken to me, now realizing that must’ve been Cin.

None of them answered aloud, but their silence spoke volumes. She really put herself in a tight spot to help us, well, me… but what did that mean? What did any of this mean?

“So, the rivalry between you guys and the Ricci family isn’t just about money? It's about this organization thing?”

All of them nodded before Rion picked up the explanation. “There's been a long-standing rivalry between our families. The Ambroses were one of the founding families, and we’ve made a lot of the major advancements for Foedus. This makes us high up in the ranks.”

“How high?” I interrupted, feeling like he was trying to gloss over this part.

Rion hesitated, but Roux blurted, “Our uncle likes to open his big, fat mouth, so he’s made a few enemies among the heads of some of the other families. If he hadn’t done that, he would be the speaker for the council, not Maria Ricci, the woman who’d been sitting in front of you. She’s the head of the Ricci family.”

And Cinzia’s mother rang in my head even though he didn’t mention it.

I could see how Cin was in a difficult position. Either she stayed loyal to a friend she’d just met, or her family who was a part of something that had dire consequences. Remembering all the things my roommate had done to help me, I kind of felt bad for her.

“Basically, our father was the last speaker, and his father before that, and his mother before that. For centuries, the speaker was an Ambros.” Rion kept his tone even, almost like he didn’t care about what he was saying, but it seemed like it was important. “Since our uncle was inept at making proper connections with the council members, they pressured him to find our father’s missing heir.”

Rion paused. Ravi smirked, then rushed to speak before his brother. “He just didn't expect there to be triplets, and since the rules were strict, he knew he couldn't introduce all three of us.”

With furrowed brows, I looked at him, about to ask a question, but Rion butted back in. “In Foedus, if a set of multiples is born, each of them next in line to succeed their family, then one must kill the others. They don’t take into account the small details like who was born first; they are just seen as equal contenders for the ‘throne.’ Foedus claims the elimination of the others is the fairest way to settle the line of succession—survival of the fittest.” He snarled at the end, telling me how he really felt, and I was almost there with him. How could this group demand that? It wasn't the children’s fault.

Suddenly, it dawned on me. “That's why you need to play like you’re one person, so you’re not forced to eliminate one another.”

“So, you are able to put simple things together, Rin. Bravo.” The slow clap Roux was giving me made my back straighten and my nails dig into the couch.

We were glaring at each other, both of us on the wrong side of our emotions, when I spat out, “And what about what I found in your rooms, huh? How can you explain all that to me?”

This time, all of them tensed up. Ravi was rubbing his hands together, his head down, and Rion's whole face clenched, making it seem like he was made of stone. Roux gripped his biceps so hard I thought they would pop. They were clearly on edge and didn’t want to say anything.