Page 56 of Love is Grand
“Let’s go see if they stocked the kitchen as promised.” He headed toward the back. The layout was similar to Adam and Rylan’s, but their house was a beachy contemporary.
“Should I take off my shoes?”
Cal turned and stared at me. “Do whatever you want, Shell. This is as much your space as mine.”
He kept moving, but I was stuck standing in the foyer, freezing from the air-conditioning despite being pregnant.
“Shell, what’s wrong?” He came back around to find me.
“This isn’t my space,” I said, staring at the marble floor. “My space is the tiny house I live in with Weez, and soon, our baby. It’s dilapidated and run-down, but mine. Thank God, I never put Ricky’s name on the deed since he wasn’t paying any money toward it and my parents paid the down payment as a wedding gift. At the time, I thought they were stupid for doing so. I mean, Ricky and I were going to buy a house on our own.”
Cal came close and wrapped an arm around me, putting his finger over my lips and whispering, “Shush.”
I took a deep breath and realized he was right. I was rambling about things that had no significance between us.
“They do,” he said.
“Was I talking out loud?”
He nodded, not letting go of me. “You’re getting yourself upset. That’s why I said to shush. The baby doesn’t need you to be upset.”
This time, it was my turn to nod.
“I want you to feel at home here,” he said.
“I’m a guest.”
“You’re not,” he said firmly.
I broke free from his embrace. “Cal, this house is bigger than my house and my parents’ combined. I worked for tips until a week ago. I barely have any savings. I am most certainly a guest in a place like this, and often an employee.”
He stood there perfectly still, just staring at me. I was getting myself upset again, and I didn’t care.
“We’re not moving in together,” I said, just getting wound up. “We’re not making a life together, outside of the baby and this friends with benefits thing we have going on. I know my place.”
There was never a good time to discuss what are we doing? Yet, here we were doing it.
“That isn’t your place, as a guest or employee.” Cal approached again, tugging me to his chest, tipping my gaze toward his, his index finger on my chin. “I haven’t given you a ring, but that doesn’t mean this isn’t something. We aren’t friends with benefits. We’re more. I’m doing right by you, and this is as much your space as mine. I don’t live here. I make a living in New York, but when I’m here, you can be here, and when I’m not here, you can be here too.”
I nodded. Cal hadn’t made a promise to marry me or move here, but he was trying, I guessed. Although, he hadn’t invited me to his home in New York, which made my mind wander.
Did he have someone else who shared that space? Was Sophia back in his life?
I told myself it wasn’t my business. I didn’t have the answers, nor could I find the words, so I kissed him. Why did I kiss him? It was complicated, but whatever we did have was the only thing I had, and I liked it.
Apparently, that kiss was enough of a response for Cal because he led me toward the kitchen and opened the fridge.
“What can I get you to drink?” he asked after making it known he wasn’t going to marry me.
I mean, I knew that, but that didn’t make it hurt any less.
“Water,” I said, taking in the man in front of me.
His hair was a bit disheveled from his flight, and his shirt a little wrinkled, but his eyes were bright and promising. I realized then that I was falling for him.
He brought over a glass and a liter of bottled water, then poured it for me. Once I’d taken a sip, he took my glass and set it down, standing in front of the stool where I was sitting.
“Shell, I didn’t say I wasn’t going to give you a ring. I said I haven’t. What I meant was I haven’t yet.”