Page 19 of Hawk
“Why not?”
“When I was locked up, she didn’t want anything to do with me.”
“But she does now?”
“Yes, only because she’s running from someone.”
“From who?”
“The guy she was messing around with when I was away. She broke things off with me when she learned I was arrested, so I guess she had a right to move on, but this guy is abusive. She’s literally on the run from him.”
“Hold up, Hawk. I know you’re not letting some punk threaten your wife and your child.”
“Ivy is only my wife by name. We’re not together. I’m not the man she wants a future with. I know that much. I knew that the day I tried to callher and she told me she was done. She washed her hands clean of me and thought she had landed someone better. Now she’s scared to death of him.”
“I understand all that, but think about your reputation. How will it look if you don’t handle your business? Like it or not, Ivy is still your property.”
I hang my head and massage the back of my neck. I know he’s right, but the anger I feel is holding me back from doing what I need to do. I need to protect her, which is what I think I’m doing. I also need to build a relationship with my daughter. I’m not doing too well with that, but I need to start now.
I drive home, go inside and immediately spot my little girl in the living room. Ivy is sitting on the sofa. I scoop up Lilly and turn to head outside.
“Wait—where are you going with her?” Ivy asks like I’m going to kidnap her or something.
“What are you doing, Gideon?” she asks, chasing me out the front door.
“I’m spending some quality time with my daughter.”
“But—”
“But what? Look at her. Does she look bothered?”
Ivy pauses and takes a moment to look at Lilly. We both do. My happy little girl has a smile on her face as she stares down at me almost as if she can sense our relation. She knows she’s mine, or at the very least that I’m safe to be with despite my many tattoos and rugged appearance.
“She’s fine with me,” I say. “You trusted me enough to bring her here, didn’t you?”
“I did, but—”
“Then trust that I will never do anything to harm her.”
“Okay. Fine,” she says but she doesn’t go back inside. She sits on the steps while I tote Lilly to the driveway. I show her my motorcycle. She clamors to get down and when she does, she touches the wheel and other areas that she can reach.
“That’s a motorcycle, babygirl.”
“Vroom, vroom,” she says, looking at me and smiling with those chubby cheeks.
“Would you look at that?” I say out loud. “She must takes after her old man. I never could get you to touch one of these.”
“That’s because they’re dangerous.”
“Only if the rider is untrained, Ivy. For me, riding is freedom. You’ll never feel freer and more empowered until you hop on one of these babies. I can’t wait to teach Lilly how to ride.”
I say that just to ruffle Ivy’s feathers. Something I’ve noticed about her since she’s been here is, she’s not the bold, outspoken woman she used to be. Abuse has stolen her voice and it shows, even if she doesn’t recognize it. I need to tread lightly with her – help her get it back. She’s stronger than this. Lilly needs the strong version. After talking with Sheol earlier, I know for a fact that I still have feelings for her.
“Alright, babygirl…time to go back inside before your mom has a stroke over there.”
“Whatever,” she says and rolls her eyes.
I smile inwardly. Yeah, that’s right. Bring some of that sass back. That’s the Ivy I know.