Page 73 of Blinded By Hate
“Please stay with me.” I really shouldn’t. I need to get out of here before I go insane and lose control. With this girl, I never have control. But instead of saying no and leaving, I take my shoes and jacket off before climbing in. While climbing in, I notice two orange pill bottles on her nightstand. I am about to grab one of the bottles but then Jaclyn turns around and says, “Can you hold me? I’m cold.” I forget about the bottles, for now, and throw my arm over her waist and pull her closer to me. Her knee grazes my dick and I hiss but try to ignore it. “I can give you a blowie if you’re hard, Hay Hay,” Jaclyn whispers before giggling.
More blood rushes to my dick but I try, so fucking hard, to ignore it. “Sleep,” I say, before resting my forehead in her neck and closing my eyes.
It’s quiet for a few seconds before Jaclyn says my name. I open my eyes and see her staring at me. “Why don’t you love me anymore?”
A pang of hurt strikes my heart.
She has no fucking clue.
Jaclyn happens to know all of my secrets even after all these years, except one. That I’m still madly in love with her.
She’s drunk so it's not like she’ll remember what I say.
“You have no clue how much I love you,” I whisper. “The fact that I'm here with you in bed doing nothing rather than with her, shows how much I still love you. I wish I could tell you more but I can’t. Not right now.”
Jaclyn doesn’t say anything, instead she leans up and presses her lips against mine.
I don’t kiss her back, instead I just stay still and feel the movement of her lips on mine, taking her all in.
“Kiss me back,” Jaclyn says and I can hear the hurt in her tone.
Instead of kissing her lips I kiss her forehead. “Go to sleep.”
“Goodnight, Hayden.”
“Goodnight, princess.”
Twenty-Nine
Jaclyn
Present
As soon as I wake up I fling the blankets off me and run towards the bathroom. I fall to the floor in front of the toilet, lift the lid and everything from last night just spills from my mouth.
Tears fall from my eyes as I throw everything up in the toilet. Once I’m done, I close the lid and go to the sink. I immediately brush my teeth to get rid of the god-awful taste in my mouth.
What even happened last night?
I walk back inside the room once I’m done and look around.
My bag is open and the bed is a mess. I look at my clothes and see I'm wearing just a regular baggy t-shirt and shorts. I walk to the bed and lay down, throwing the covers over myself. I rest my head against the pillow and immediately smell cologne.
I lift my head and stare at the pillow.
The smell is familiar.
Woodsy, warm, and fresh scent.
I know this smell.
Did I bring someone here last night?
What did I do while I was drunk?
Last thing I remember was Max and Martin taking shots with me. Kayden was somewhere in the mix. I remember the cute bartender and I flirting but that’s it.
Shit.