Page 87 of Say It Again
Aaron fell to the mercy of raspy laughter and finally collapsed into his seat, where he tried to assemble the council of his mind, but they were out to lunch. Or all passed out whiskey-drunk. Daniel grazed his way back up, and when he saw him, it was like Aaron could bathe in the way he looked. His lips, red and swollen, even more striking than usual, matched his cheeks, flushed hot with color. He looked full of want and eager to please. He looked consumed with emotion. He looked in love.
Aaron kissed him, but what Aaron really needed to do was get him home and worship him head to toe. “You.” He grazed his thumb over Daniel’s lower teeth just to feel something sharp against his buzzing fingertips. “So you don’t need to breathe?”
Daniel cleared his throat, his smile proud. “There are more important things.”
Aaron chuckled and tried to settle his stupid breath. “That wasn’t too rough for you?”
“Hell no.” Daniel bit his thumb. “I can still talk, can’t I?”
“What about me? Am I talking? What am I saying?”
“You were saying how amazing I am.”
“You are.” Aaron touched their foreheads together. “You are amazing, and I think you might’ve been made for me. Made with me in mind.”
“Aw.” Daniel thumbed his cheek. “How narcissistic.”
Aaron laughed, all high in his head.
“I love you,” Daniel said, his little half-smile adorable.
Aaron stiffened, his throat seizing shut.
Three simple words hung in the air like forbidden fruit, but he couldn’t pluck them from their branch. Even though they were right there. Even though three plucks were all it would take—one I, one L, one Y—he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t.
“Hey,” Daniel asked, his forehead rutted with concern. “You okay?”
Aaron cast his gaze downward and shook his head while he drew a circle, a little too roughly, in the palm of Daniel’s hand.
If love was money, then he’d fix this. He’d make enough to keep people around and always keep them safe. He’d make enough to say, Anything you want, it’s yours. He’d make so much that no one would leave, and Daniel couldn’t leave, and please don’t leave. Not yet.
Stay. Just a little while longer.
“Aaron,” Daniel said. “What’s wrong?”
“Listen, I’m nuts about you, but I can’t say that. I don’t know, I’m messed up or something, but um. Let me work on it. I’ll work on it, I’ll do that, and it’ll come with time.” He couldn’t make his words sound promising. They sounded as shaky as his sigh. “Goddammit. Give me time, okay? Please? Just a little time. I’m so sorry—”
“Shh, of course.” Daniel tenderly stroked his hair. “Of course, take your time. There’s no rush. What was that…?” He snapped his fingers like he was trying to recall a word. “Oh! My mom said, ‘People experience life in different strides.’”
He nodded, biting his lower lip hard enough to puncture it. “I like it when you say it. I like it a lot, but I want you to know that you don’t have to.”
“I don’t have to say it?” Daniel tilted his head. He looked like he couldn’t get more confused, which was fair. It was confusing. He smoothed a thumb over Aaron’s lip until he stopped biting. “Well, I don’t mind. What if I say it enough for both of us?”
“Really?”
“Oh, easy.” Then Daniel said, “I love you.”
Aaron drank in the sound of it. “Say it again.”
“I love you.”
“Again. With my name.”
“I love you, Aaron Silva.”
He pulled Daniel into him, buried his face in his curls, and breathed. “What a night. Let’s go home.”
“My place or yours?”