Page 28 of Phoenix
Warren dismounts his bike and stretches up tall before removing his leather jacket and helmet. A few tattoos I remember seeing on the night he had stayed with me, reveal themselves in the light of day and I can’t help staring. He turns and catches me and he almost looks ashamed. I don’t think either one of us fully understands what made us give into something so reckless that night, we were but strangers; him a threat to my sanity, me a job. But happened it did, and although he obviously feels bad about it, I haven’t yet made up my mind.
“Don’t worry, Jess,” he says, smiling tightly, “we’re not going shopping. Lou has brought you some stuff you can have. Thought it might be the easiest thing for both our sakes.” His brow raises and he smiles. I guess someone like Warren enjoys shopping as much as I do. Mom has been buying my clothes ever since I returned…home. Not only did I not want to go outside of the house, but I also just didn’t care.
“Ok,” I reply, feeling a little nervous about meeting his sister. I have no idea what to expect other than she is very pretty and married to someone very wealthy. That thought alone makes me feel inadequate, like I’m turning up to a fancy wedding in a potato sack. He says nothing to put me at ease so there is little else to do but follow him into the small diner on the street corner.
There is nothing special about this place, no themes, gimmicks, or pretense. Diners were one of the few places I saw plenty of; Daddy used to take Jake and me to them all the time. He liked the outlandish ones, those that tried to be something they weren’t – Disney-themed, fifties features with old-fashioned jukeboxes, or celebrity endorsed with a picture on the wall with scrawl that claimed they were best friends with the owners. We had to pretend to be a perfect family, plaster on fake smiles and laugh at things that truly weren’t funny. It was always bittersweet for me - a chance to be outside of that basement, at least pretending to be happy, but also surrounded by real families and their genuine laughter.
This place doesn’t pretend to be anything other than what it serves – sticky food, reusable ketchup bottles, and a laminated drinks menu that hasn’t been updated since opening. A man sits alone, staring at his cup as though it’s replaying all the years he’s lived, all of them bitter and sad. A couple of moms and their offspring are laughing in the back, discussing their breastfeeding nightmares and how hard their husbands are finding the new adjustment to family life. The server behind the counter is reading a magazine with a bored expression on her face and a lump of gum in her mouth. I feel instantly more comforted in here; Daddy would never set foot in a place like this.
“Phoenix?”
The sound of a young, somewhat happier-sounding voice than I was expecting grabs my attention. I turn to see a beautiful, female version of Warren sitting in a window seat next to a man wearing an expensive suit. He is attractive, like her, and they’re both wearing wedding rings. While I stare at them like a scared child meeting strangers for the first time, Warren grabs hold of my hand and pulls me over to their table.
“Good morning, love’s young dream,” he says sarcastically as he kisses his sister on the cheek and shakes who I’m assuming is his brother-in-law’s hand. “How’s suburbia? Thoroughly boring?”
“Stop it!” Louisa tsks as he chuckles to himself.
During their embrace, I have no idea what to do, how to look, or how to stand, so I end up cowering behind, probably looking like a spare part. As if sensing my discomfort, Louisa and her husband peer around Warren’s large bicep to get a glimpse of me and smile.
“Hi, I’m Lou, and this is Daniel. Please forgive my ill-mannered big brother for not introducing us properly. Contrary to popular belief, Dad did raise us to be polite and courteous.”
“Now, come on, Lou, he did punch me in the face on our second meeting,” Daniel says before chuckling to himself. I notice Warren merely flashing him a grin with predatory-type teeth, reminding me of a cartoon shark. “Nice to meet you; Jess, isn’t it?”
“Yes,” I all but whisper but he’s kind enough to ignore my timidity.
“Jess,” Warren says in his baritone voice, “take a seat, no one’s going to bite, and you are perfectly safe.”
“Sorry,” I mumble before sitting next to him where his warm leg that’s covered in ripped jeans molds against my own.
“So,” Lou begins with her own painfully wide smile, “Phoenix tells me you like to draw. I could never get into it, even though I wanted to so very badly,” she says, and I smile awkwardly. “Course, I could always count on my brother here to tell me I had no talent.”
“Oh,” I utter, “that’s…charming,” I can’t help saying before looking at him as though he is the devil himself. He merely shrugs his shoulders and laughs over my reaction.
“He did teach me how to play guitar though, as a replacement for my lack of artistic talent,” Lou continues. “We Flynns are gifted with long fingers, so I guess it’s our calling.”
“Hunter, baby, you are now a Hunter,” Daniel says as he pulls her against his side and places a lingering kiss on her temple, which she leans into with a goofy expression.
“Don’t make her feel even worse, Daniel,” Phoenix teases.
“I’m not that good,” I finally reply, rubbing anxiously at my neck because a middle-aged guy who has the same-colored hair as Daddy did, has just walked inside with a grin that has me feeling sick. Phoenix seems to notice my fidgeting and grabs hold of my hand, his way of offering me reassurance. “It was all I had access to…growing up. Jake used to ask me to draw fake tattoos on him with felt tips, but I think it was just to pass the time and keep me calm.”
“Oh,” Lou says with a look of sympathy, and I instantly kick myself for already making the atmosphere feel heavier. “How is Jake, anyway? Still resorting to toilet humor?”
“Only for about ninety percent of the time, so that’s a huge improvement for him,” Warren laughs alongside Lou and Daniel.
“That’s my fault,” I blurt out because Jake is my brother, and I can’t stand to hear people laughing at him, not after everything we went through together. They all look at me with furrowed brows and an invitation to explain myself. I grab hold of a sugar packet to begin fidgeting with. “He would tell me rude jokes to cheer me up – a lot.” I laugh nervously, even though what I’m saying isn’t funny at all. “Sometimes it was the only thing to stop me crying. The poor guy probably developed a habit.”
The table turns silent with no one quite knowing where to look.
“Jake is a good guy, truly, he looked after me when I thought I’d have no one. We were both in a horrible, unbelievable situation. You should be proud of him.” I then turn to face Louisa, hoping I look sincere. “Your brother too. I may not have appreciated it at the time, but he’s done nothing but look out for me since the moment we met.”
“I know,” Lou replies with a smile just for her brother, and I notice a distinct blush spreading over his cheeks. “Phoenix has always had a hero complex and I couldn’t be prouder to call him my brother. As for Jake, he is practically a brother too. Please don’t mistake my teasing for thinking badly of them. It’s just the way we are. We do it to each other, Jake included.”
“I can appreciate that,” I tell her quietly, “my best friend had brothers and they were the same. They were always fighting and poking fun at one another, but if anyone so much as looked at her the wrong way, they were in for a world of pain. I’m just a little protective of Jake; to me, he is my brother and to him, I’m his sister.”
“Are you sure that’s all he sees you as?” Warren suddenly asks from beside me, so I turn to look at him with a perplexed expression. He merely shrugs his shoulders before turning back to his sister who is now looking just as confused as I am.
“Anyway,” Daniel says, drawing out the word, no doubt trying to break the tension, “Lou, why don’t you show Jess what you’ve got. We heard Phoenix didn’t exactly pack much when he brought you back to his place.”