Page 55 of The Breakdown

She pulled back the covers and went into the bathroom to turn on the shower. As she bathed, she tried to wash the remnants of the dream away. It had moved her deeply, soulfully. She’d wanted it so badly to be real. She still couldn’t believe it wasn’t.

“It almost was,” she said as she stood under the hot spray of the shower. Her mind went back to the night before, when she’d tasted Natalie for real, stared into her green eyes, and felt her body pressed against her own. She recalled lying down atop her, taking her in her arms and feeling the heat of her center against her thigh.

“Jesus,” she whispered as she traced her hand down her taut abdomen to her own center. She glided over the pressure she felt there, and her knees nearly buckled with instant release as the sudden climax rocked her. She leaned against the shower wall and breathed deeply, trying to recover. The stitches of pain in her back caused her to wince, but she didn’t care. The release had felt incredible and she felt like she could breathe better and see clearer. The fog of her mind had also vaporized.

She turned off the water and dried, thinking of Natalie, wondering how she felt about the night before. Was she still thinking of her? Was she still aching for her touch? Was she dreaming of her?

Vaughn climbed from the shower, wrapped her towel around herself, and walked into the bedroom to dress. After she pulled on a pair of worn jeans and slid into a thin flannel shirt, she stared at herself in the dresser mirror, combing back her long mane. She noted the dark crescents beneath her eyes, the sharpness to her cheekbones. She was tired and losing weight, the pain in her back almost too much to bear at the end of the day. She’d probably hurt it more lifting Natalie in her arms, but it had been a moment of passion, one she didn’t regret. Not even knowing that it probably shouldn’t happen again.

She pushed away from the dresser and switched off the light before making her way to the living room to slip into her boots at the couch. Once she did, she started the coffee maker for Gram, grabbed her own bottle of cold water, and stepped outside. It was still dark out and the air was heavy with moisture from another recent downpour. She walked to the stables, intent on seeing Miracle. She’d stayed most of the night with her, trying to sleep by her side. But sleep had been elusive and she hadn’t wanted to keep Miracle from resting, so she’d gone into the house to bed.

She walked past the guesthouse and snuck a look. The house was still dark, and she breathed a sigh of relief. She didn’t know what she was going to say to Natalie, or how she was going to behave. How could she tell her that what had happened was a mistake? That she wasn’t ready for anything, especially a relationship? And that Natalie had enough to deal with with her ex-husband? They were both in no position to forge ahead together. Right? Or am I just looking for excuses?

Either way, the timing was wrong, she could feel it.

But I also feel fear.

She shook the realization away and carried on, entering the stables and hurrying down to Miracle’s stall. She found the horse standing and she breathed a sigh of relief seeing that she was indeed okay.

“Hey, you,” she said, stroking her nose. “Did you rest well?” She walked to the nearby shelves where she retrieved a small bucket of soaked alfalfa cubes. She dug some out and brought them to her to eat. “Hungry, aren’t you?” She rested her forehead against Miracle’s neck as she chewed. “I was so worried about you, girl. You have no idea. But I’m so glad you’re home safe.” She stroked her and inhaled her earthy scent. Outside, more rain began to fall, ticking off the roof of the stable.

“Looks like another rainy day. You gonna be okay with that?” Miracle snorted and Vaughn chuckled. “I thought as much. We’ll keep you right here, all snug like a bug in a rug. How’s that sound?”

“Sounds pretty good to me,” a voice said from behind.

Startled, Vaughn turned to see Natalie. She was standing near the stall with her hands in her jeans pockets, a thick green hoodie covering her upper body, setting off her mesmerizing gaze.

“Morning,” she said, giving a small smile.

“Morning,” Vaughn said, a lump already forming in her throat. “You’re up early.”

“Mm, a little. I saw you come in here so I thought I’d come out to say hello.”

“Oh. Hello.”

“Hi.” She rocked back on her heels. “How are you?”

“I’m okay.” Vaughn refocused on Miracle.

“How is she?”

“She seems to be alright.”

“That’s good.”

“Yeah.”

“She’s lucky. Guess the name suits her.”

Vaughn rubbed Miracle’s snout. “Guess so.”

“So, you got a minute?”

“What for?”

“I was hoping we could talk about last night while we still had some privacy.”

Vaughn’s stomach tightened. “What about it?”