Page 29 of A Constant Love
Mama
Tears were streaming down my cheeks so fast I could barely stop them before they hit the paper.
I must have sat there for an hour reading over it again and again, every time able to hear my mom’s voice saying the words.
God, I missed her. I missed her so much. Usually, I just tried not to think about her because it hurt too damn much. Reading her letter though didn’t bring me more grief…it brought me hope.
Chapter 19 – Sam
I pulled the rest of the letters out of the box and read the writing on the envelopes.
John.
Jessie.
Luke.
To the man my daughter decides to marry.
A smile crossed my face at a memory that hit me. I was five years old in my bedroom with Mama who was having a tea party with me. It was one of her good days…back then, she had more good ones than bad.
I remember telling her, “I’m never getting married. Boys are just stupid. That Timmy Jones in town tried telling me I was pretty, so I shoved his face in the dirt.”
She smiled. “One day, a boy will come along who makes you think differently. Of course, I think the only man good enough to marry my daughter would have to be a prince or something equally as noble.”
“Even if he is a prince, I bet he’ll still be dumb.”
My mama started laughing so hard tea came out of her nose.
“Oh, Samantha Lynn, whoever tries to marry you will need a lasso for the ride you’ll take them on.”
Memories like that one I had tried to forget. It was easier to deal with loss when you only remembered the bad instead of all the good.
Setting the shoe box on the floor, I grabbed the other letters. I quickly ran downstairs to the basement to put my future husband’s letter away and came back to the living room. My dad and the boys were watching football.
“Well, look at you,” Luke said. “Coming back around to our country ways?” He pointed to my outfit.
“I didn’t pack a bag, okay? This was left from when I lived here.” I turned my attention toward my dad. “Dad, did you ever even look at Mom’s stuff in the closet?”
“Not really. Didn’t feel right going through her stuff like that.”
“Well, maybe you should have. I found these.” I held up the letters.
My dad stood from his chair taking them envelopes in his hands. He looked at me, and I simply nodded.
“You mean these have been in there all this time, and I didn’t know?”
“We know now…and trust me, it’s worth the wait.”
My dad handed the letters to my brothers, and I opted to take a walk and let them have their private moment like I did. Besides, I had somewhere I wanted to see.
Spring was in the air as I walked down the gravel road of our long driveway. Sunshine warmed my back as I enjoyed the gorgeous day.
After about twenty minutes of walking, I found what I was looking for…the small cemetery that sat on the side of an old country road.
I headed all the way toward the back, taking my time reading the different headstones along the way. Most last names were ones I recognized of families in town.
When I finally got to the one I sought, I read the stone.