Page 3 of Dawn of Hope
Too bad.
As always, when his eyes come to my face, they quickly dart away, a look flashing across his before he schools it back into a mask of indifference.
I shift uncomfortably at his disapproval and clasp my hands behind my back. “I came as soon as I could.”
“I want to discuss the ceremony with you.” He turns to sit on his throne, eyes still falling anywhere but my face.
Brynne’s armor clanks as she shifts behind me. She notices his obvious dismissal too.
“The ceremony and ball,” I say. I am one of the few people in the castle who dares to correct the king.
He continues without acknowledging my addition. “As I’m sure you know, the celebration stems from Blackwood tradition. There are many elements of the ceremony that are integral for the future queen of this kingdom. I have instructed Edmond to ensure that your lessons over the next few weeks will make you adequately prepared for it. A few weeks is a sufficient amount of time. I expect the ceremony will go smoothly. Understood?”
I nod. “Of course.”
He speaks as if this ceremony is news to me, not that I have been dreaming about it for years. As a child, I had little to do after completing my day’s lessons than wander the castle and read. I would get lost for hours in books filled with magic and balls, princesses being swept off of their feet and living happily ever after. Finding out about the coming-of-age ceremony for the rulers of Blackwood only fueled my naïve excitement that one day I would get to experience the same thing.
As I grew older, I still looked forward to my twenty-first birthday and the ceremony, but not for the same reasons. I was no longer naïve enough to believe in magic or being swept away by a prince, but I hoped that for just one night I could escape the intense loneliness that followed me around the castle halls, sinking deep into my bones. I wanted a real escape, not one just between the pages of books.
The stories grew as I did and were no longer filled with solely happily ever afters. There was plenty of political scheming, backstabbing, and forbidden romance.
I didn’t want to admit it, but I still deep down wondered if the night of my ceremony, the night I would be officially recognized as the future queen of Blackwood and able to rule the kingdom if something were to happen to my father, would actually be the night that my life would change.
Maybe opening our doors to other kingdoms and establishing relationships with other future leaders would help break my father’s hold on me, his so-called ‘protection’ from whatever he was afraid of.
These kinds of events were not just the things of storybooks and actually had political use. Many trade deals were struck, allies formed, and even marriage contracts negotiated. Marriage was not at all on my list of concerns for this event. My father would never allow it, not yet anyway. Not until it was absolutely necessary to further the line of Blackwood. If it was, he wouldn’t have hidden me from everyone in the land, including our own people. In twenty years, they have never once laid eyes on their own princess.
He lifts his arm and gestures to the back of the room, beckoning someone forward.
I glance over my shoulder to see Tila striding toward the throne. Her apprentices follow closely behind her, their arms laden with bolts of fabric.
“Are there any topics you’d like us to review regarding the other kingdoms? I want to be prepared in case things such as goods or trade routes come up?—”
“I will handle those discussions.” He cuts me off, and heat rises on the back of my neck.
I keep my face blank, but my gaze trained on him.
Why doesn’t he want me to be prepared for conversations with other kingdoms? The sons and daughters of the current monarchs are to be my peers one day. How does he expect me to be the queen of Blackwood if I have no relationships or history with any of them? I will look like a porcelain princess in their eyes, never involved in anything of substance, just there to sit on the throne and look pretty.
This ceremony, my birthday, is to be my first impression, and I don’t want to disappoint. I want to be seen as a strong future queen, and a force to be reckoned with.
In my lifetime, my father has never invited neighboring rulers or alliesinto the castle. There are stories, whispers amongst the staff, or snippets of Edmond’s reminiscing, which told me that this was not how things used to be. As a young king who walked among the people, he heard their struggles and successes, their happiness and sadness. He cared about them, and they cared about him, earning loyalty both ways.
He would hold meetings with other kings, and my mother would host grand balls to welcome everyone. There were picnics and hunts, things that showed off all the kingdom of Blackwood had to offer to the visitors.
Our forests filled with unique sky high black wooded trees are a source of awe, and a thriving trade that brings in a significant amount of money for our people. Keeping up these relationships is important for the success of our kingdom.
All of this stopped as soon as my mother was gone. As soon as I was here.
I never knew this world. Not once was there a party at the castle, or friends to invite from other kingdoms. I never knew the prospect of meeting princes I could marry. I had no hope for a happily ever after, like I read about as a child. What made me actually think I could have a happy ending when I watched my father be so unhappy every day of his life?
Maybe this celebration would finally convince my father that things could be different, and he didn’t have to hide me away. I can prove to him I belong amongst the other rulers and could begin to build relationships with them for the future of our kingdom.
If only he didn’t keep shutting me down every time I try to show him I am ready for my place in the kingdom.
“Your majesty.” The royal seamstress, Tila, dips into a deep curtsy, bowing her head toward my father. She steps in front of me, looking me up and down.
“Tsk, tsk, tsk,” she clucks as she glides around, assessing me on all sides. “Be mindful of the mud. I do not want the fabrics ruined.” Her assistants scurry around me, one of them placing a small pedestal at my feet.