Page 4 of Dawn of Hope
“Sorry Tila.” The stoic face I keep for my father cracks and softens slightly as I mutter my apology and step up on the pedestal. I always feel like a child again when I stand on it in front of everyone, not only because the position brings back memories of Tila dressing me for as long as I can remember, but also because my height makes me feel like a child in comparison. The pedestal does nothing but elevate my short stature, and make it easier for them to move about, sticking me with pins and pulling things tight.
Tila gives me a soft smile. She knows me almost as well as Brynne and Edmond. She hates that I don’t love the extravagant gowns and showy clothes she always wants to create, not that I have much occasion to wear them. I’d much rather wear mud covered pants or a simple soft dress than the ball gown, but she doesn’t judge me for it. Too much, at least.
Her assistants get to work, wrapping their tape measures around my body and jostling me into different positions.
Tila turns back toward my father and claps her hands. “This is to be the grandest dress we’ve made for her highness to date. Traditional, of course, but grand. I’m thinking satin, in the kingdom’s colors. The gold will complement her hair.” Tila gestures at my hair, my normal wavy golden tresses bound into a tight braid that falls over my shoulder, then gives a sound of disgust. “At least it will when she isn’t covered in dirt and grime.” She looks back toward my father. “Are there any specifics you have in mind, your majesty?”
“No Tila, thank you.” A small smile lifts his face, following his quick response.
I feel a pang in my chest at the tiny gesture. Many would not notice it, but I do. How can everyone else in the castle earn such respect and acknowledgement from my father, but for years, he has barely looked at or spoken to me? It has only worsened as I age, and I do not understand it. No matter what I try to do, how well I perform at my lessons, or how skilled I am in training, nothing is ever enough.
The girls jostle me as Tila gives them direction, but I’m not listening.Instead, I am focused on my father as he turns his attention to Brynne.
“Since you have not yet been present for a ceremony, you may be unaware of a crucial element. The ceremony involves the presentation of the future queen with her own dagger for protection. Have you been including dagger skills in her training?”
“Rarely, your majesty. She is competent with a sword and a bow. I will adjust her training regimen to incorporate dagger work.”
My eyes flick down to the dagger at my father’s side. I’d always admired it growing up. It is gorgeous, with a red jeweled handle set in gold, and never leaves his side. Every reigning king or queen designs a dagger for their heir’s ceremony and presents it to them on their twenty-first birthday. They are never to part with it, even in death, to ensure they are always protected.
The dagger would be useless if I don’t know how to use it, so I’m sure our interrupted spar would be forgotten, and instead I’d be working on honing those skills.
“Be sure that you do. It is important.” He gives Brynne a terse nod, sealing his command.
Brynne bows in acknowledgement. “Yes, your majesty.”
He stands from his throne, still refusing to look me in the eye. “You may go.” His words are quiet but firm as he strides toward the doorway off to the right of the dais.
The dismissal is clear, but I cannot move. Tila’s assistants have me wrapped in a fabric that is draped behind me, halfway down the aisle.
I make a sound of distaste as I look back at it.
“Don’t scoff. Scoffing isn’t for princesses.” Tila’s voice is hard with a mock scolding.
I roll my eyes as I turn back to her. “You know I hate tripping on gowns.”
“Well, that should not be a problem, as there will be no need to make a hasty getaway in this one.” She smirks and then claps her hands. “I think we are done here. We have enough to get started. We are on a tight schedule, but I will make it work.”
“Thank you Tila. I’m sure it will be beautiful.” I smile at her as I step off the pedestal.
She returns it warmly. “It will be. Just like the future queen wearing it.” She steps around me and quickly makes her way out of the throne room, her assistants trailing behind her. Tila is an older woman, and while we don’t interact daily, I’ve known her my whole life. She is like a protective aunt, in the absence of a real one, since neither of my parents had siblings. Hearing the pride in her voice brings a tickle of a tear to my eye.
I turn on my heel and stride quickly toward the door. Brynne’s sure footsteps trail behind me, but she doesn’t say a word. She knows how I feel after these meetings with my father and knows that even though we have been training all afternoon, I am going to need to work off some more steam.
Thoughts of the upcoming ceremony flood my mind.
Why is my father so insistent that I leave all political duties to him? I’ve been preparing for this day for years, and it is finally my time to cement my place as a future ruler of this kingdom.
It seems like he doesn’t want me to be.
But why? I race through the possibilities, coming up with nothing except for one glaring reality.
He doesn’t think I am capable of being queen.
Is that the reason he doesn’t trust me to discuss important topics with the other heirs? Is it why he keeps me locked away, preventing anyone from knowing me, or letting me experience the world outside these walls? He doesn’t even want our people to know anything more than my name.
What kind of king completely disregards his heir?
He hasn’t even acknowledged that this is to take place on my birthday. He never did. Year after year to him, it is just another day.