Page 55 of The Plus-One Deal

“Well, ah, my mother…” I cleared my throat. She hadn’t been around much, hard as she’d tried. I remembered one time getting sick at daycare, wanting my mom, but no one could reach her. “I’ll be honest,” I said. “It’s hard striking a balance. There’ll be times when you’re making hard choices, when it’s between family and your career. If your kid’s throwing up and you’ve got a deal closing, you might have to pick one, your deal or being there.”

“That sounds kind of bad,” said the first boy who’d spoken. “You see all those memes online —Don’t live to work. Work to live!So, how do you do that? Do you schedule, like, life?”

I opened my mouth to give my stock answer —yes. Yes, you do. You schedule, like, life. You take the time you need and pencil it in there… but when had I done that? When had Ieverdone that? I hadn’t even been honest about Saturday mornings. I hadn’t kept those free since… too long to remember. Did I even have a life, in any meaningful sense?

“Life schedules itself sometimes,” I said without thinking.

“What do you mean?”

I wasn’t sure what I meant. I kept talking anyway, thinking aloud. “Recently, I took a trip a to The Bahamas. It was planned as an overnight, but a tropical storm hit. Flights out were grounded, so I got stuck there for days. And the thing was — the thing was, I had a full week planned at work. But I also had backups, I, uh…” I swallowed. I’d left Joe in charge, but not really in charge. When he’d offered to close on those two acquisitions, I’d told him to hold off, I’d do it myself. I’d cost myself both those deals, not leaning on Joe. What else had I cost myself, buried neck-deep in work? “Listen, I had the time of my life on that island. I had people I could lean on. I had timeto spare. But that’s a luxury, and you can’t waste it. If you can choose life, do it. Go home to your kid. Take that vacation while the sun’s shining. Once you miss out on something, that’s it. It’s gone. So what you’ve got to ask yourself is, what can you afford to miss?”

“This lecture,” called someone, and that got a laugh. But my head was spinning. I’d been such a fool. I’d let Claire slip away from me, not once but a hundred times. Let a life slip away that we could’ve had, a life where wedidhave time. A life where we made time. Living to work. I’d been living to work. I’d been living for meetings and mergers and Joe, lunches with clients, boring golf games. I’d been living half a life without even seeing, without stopping to ask myselfwhat’s it all for?

“That’s our time,” I said, and shut down my laptop. “Don’t listen to anyone who claims they have the answers. Our lives are all different, our goals. Our dreams. The best advice I can give you is, picture the life you want, then work back from there and figure out how to get it. Figure out how to balance your needs and your wants — what you need to survive and what will make you happy.”

The kids crowded around me, full of more questions, but I told them to email me. I’d get back to them later. All I could think of was how I’d left Claire, pushing her off to get back to my day. That wasn’t what I’d meant to do, but I’d done it. Picked work over family. Over life. Over us.

I hurried back to my car, dialing Joe as I went. He answered on the first ring.

“Joe Wells.”

“It’s Conrad. I need you to take my afternoon.”

Silence down the line. Then I heard him grunt. “You mean the London call?”

“I mean the rest of my day. I’ve got something pressing, I— I can’t talk right now. But I want you to know, I heard what you said. I’ve been micromanaging. You don’t need that. I’m going to be, I’m planning a major step back. Do you think you can handle?—”

“I’ve got your back.” Joe paused a moment, then told me “Go get her.”

I dialed Claire next, but the call went straight to voicemail. I tried her assistant, then her assistant’s assistant. I had to get to her, and get to hernow. I’d stuck my foot in it big-time, but this was our life. Somehow, I’d show her we deserved one more shot.

CHAPTER 23

CLAIRE

Afresh start,I reminded myself.Tonight’s a fresh start. I had to remember that, or I’d fall apart. This wasn’t the end of my heart’s fondest dream. It was the beginning of my next phase. My big push with Timeless.

I checked my phone one more time. Nothing from Conrad. I turned it off — time to stop checking. Time to stop waiting for a change that wasn’t coming.

Music struck up, loud and upbeat, and Verity’s models came striding out. They strutted along the improvised catwalk, spinning around to set their layered skirts flaring. The colors were gorgeous, the fabrics, the shapes. I couldn’t wait to get them on Timeless, but first, it was time to be done with the lies. The minute the show was done, I’d end the charade.

Conrad and I… we’re not together. I thought we could make it work, but it wasn’t to be.

I nodded — perfect. Short and sweet. And, best of all, completely true. We weren’t together, and never would be. I’d thought for a moment, for one shining night, maybe our future heldsomething more. But Conrad had made his choice, and now I’d make mine. I’d build the best life I could for the sake of our baby, and if he wasn’t part of that…

Tears blurred my vision. I blinked them away. If he wasn’t part of that, we would befine. Our child would be loved, and never alone. I’d be everything both my folks had been for me.

The models streamed off the catwalk and mixed with the crowd, gliding among us to show off their looks. Verity came out and gave a short speech, how delighted she was to present her new collection. How honored and thrilled she was to see such a great turnout. How she hoped everyone would enjoy the music and hors d’oeuvres.

I pulled out my phone again, then put it away. I’d wasted enough time waiting for Conrad. If he texted, I’d get to him when I had a moment. I had other priorities, our child. My business. Being my best tonight. Securing our future. My friendship with Verity, I’d salvage that too. Get us back to where we should’ve been from the start, a place of honesty. Mutual trust.

Conrad wasn’t even in my top five.

“Claire, there you are!” Verity came swooping in. “What did you think? Was the lighting too much? We had such an odyssey getting that up, getting the floods so they… Hey. You all right?”

I smiled. “Yeah, I’m great. And the lighting was perfect. It really brought out all those rich layers of color.”

Verity beamed at that. “That’s what I thought. Did you see where Ken went?” She peered about, but the crowd was too dense, well-wishers waiting to offer their congratulations. “It’s strange seeing you without your other half. Let’s set up a tennis date, maybe next week?”