Page 20 of Dirty Monsters

My breaths came in unsteady pants, and it took me a minute to realize he was scrutinizing me. Pushing my hair behind my ears, I glanced down, nervous for the first time since I arrived at Beachside.

What was it about him? I’d never been into a guy from sight alone, but somehow, he seemed different.

My eyes darted back up to him, but it was too late. I’d been caught ogling. My ears burned with embarrassment, and my cheeks flushed. He seemed angry with me, and I couldn’t figure out why.

Maybe I really wasn’t supposed to be out here yet?

I waited for him to say something, to scold me or threaten to tell my nurse, but he stayed quiet and stormed past me without a word.

It was worse than words because even though we had barely talked, this somehow felt like rejection.At that moment, I didn’t care that he was a nurse or that I was a patient. The way he dismissed my presence hurt like fuck.

A single tear slid down my face, and I quickly wiped it away. We didn’t know each other, so I had no right feeling so affected. Especially because of who we were—or weren’t—to each other. The feelings I was having were irrational.

I just felt inexplicably drawn to him.

I sat there for a few minutes before retreating to the building. I told myself that he was having a bad day, and that eased the sting enough for me to move along.

That evening at dinner, I took a seat at my normal table. The older lady, who had spoken to me the day before, was there again and finally introduced herself as Jacqueline.

She’d been in and out of rehab a couple of times. Making it the whole way through the program only to find herself back in less than six months. Her family had disowned her for all the drug use.

Lost her house.

Her car.

Drugs had essentially destroyed her life.

After sitting and talking for a while, I decided that since she had been around a while, maybe she knew a little something about the nurse that had my stomach tied in knots.

“What do you know about Ro?” I asked casually.

“He’s a looker, nice to talk to, but he’s no good.”

“How so?”

“No one here knows his deal. Most of the time, he keeps to himself. But there’s always something behind those eyes of his, telling a story. Pain, sorrow, hell, I don't know for sure. But we can all see it.”

“You think he’s dangerous?”

“Can’t be to work here. I’m sure you have to pass several background and license checks to be able to work in nursing at this facility.”

I nod my head in agreement and relief. She made him sound sinister and scary. I had no room or desire for those things in my life.

“Why’re you asking, sweetie?”

“Oh, no reason. Just saw him around and was curious.”

I didn’t dare tell her that I craved his darkness. That, for some reason, it spoke to my own darkness. I didn’t have any light to give, but I couldn’t deny I had a crush.

A big one.

Soon, I’d be in Orange House with him. We were a bad mix, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t wait to see what happened next.

Wren Carrington wasn’t technically my sister, at least not by blood, but I lived under the same roof as her from the time I was five until I was sixteen. For all intents and purposes, she was my sister—the blood child of my adoptive parents.

Parents who sent my ass back to the streets as soon as she cried about the shit my brother did to her.

I guess I couldn't blame her. As an adult, I knew how fucked up my brother was. But as a sixteen-year-old boy, I was convinced she was the reason and the cause of every bad thing that happened to me.