Page 91 of Royal Pain

As Valerio walked into the room, already chatting about what was going to happen all over again, Gage lifted his head to stare at me. It was always fascinating to me how much emotion could be relayed with piercing eyes. Plus, the man’s jaw was clenched to the point I had a feeling he was grinding his teeth. But there was promise in his expression. And even stranger?

Love.

Maybe I was overblowing what I was seeing, but the few times my mother had seemed like a real mother, a friend instead of a pawn, she’d mentioned that I should never allow anyone to make a determination as to who I fell in love with. I should be allowed to dream like any other girl of her wedding, the perfect prince.

She’d even wistfully told me about a boy she’d loved in college only to hear he’d been killed in a drive-by shooting. When I’d asked her what had happened, she’d laughed but tears had filled her eyes. I think I’d been twelve, but I’d known then something was terribly wrong with my family.

And now? I had a man I could easily fantasize about but even more, a man I could love.

Or so I prayed.

I headed back outside, the anticipation of what was going to happen keeping my stomach in knots. I was no longer certain what time it was. It just didn’t matter until twilight started to settle in. By now, the community leaders had heard the mercenaries they hired were non-communicative. That would put them more on edge, which would mean they were heavily armed.

With the breeze, I was chilled to the bone and kept my arms folded. I continued to hear their powerful voices, the discussion intense and pointed. They were true soldiers and up until recently, I hadn’t realized a war was going on. I guess somewhere in the back of my mind I must have. It was time to stop feeling sorry for myself.

There was a beautiful little garden just off the greenest patch of grass complete with roses and wildflowers, a beautiful trellis, and other flowering plants I didn’t recognize. It appeared there was a winding path in the middle and I was drawn to it. I loved nature, had always appreciated flowers of every kind. I headed off the deck, noticing at least two soldiers carrying assault rifles within yards of where I was. They glanced at me but didn’t react. It was almost funny that seeing them in the first place seemed normal.

Maybe I could turn into a mercenary.

The thought was ridiculous but possible. I was a better shot than any of them knew. The dude I’d had training me couldn’t have cared less if I was a woman. He was rough, unforgiving, and had made me go through exercises until I’d go home exhausted.

But I was grateful for it.

I moved to the path, taking my time walking in. I was pleasantly surprised seeing a stunning little fountain with a gorgeous outdoor sitting area that offered relaxation and privacy. I could see curling up on the oversized couch with a good book in my hand. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d read a book. How ridiculous.

No, I did know.

The last time I’d readPinocchioto Damien, his favorite.

I tried not to cry, which was getting harder with every passing minute. To know I was in the same city as him was killing me. I sat down on the edge of the sofa, trying to reflect on all the good times I’d had when I was able to control my life.

Gage’s sudden appearance with two drinks in his hands didn’t scare me. It simply brought an array of emotions that I was surprised existed. I continued to feel so much turmoil deep inside, the uncertainty killing me. But I couldn’t deny the security and comfort offered when Gage was close. There was a hum between us that was so electrified, it was like we were walking near a high voltage fence.

He walked closer, still studying me the same way he’d done before. There was such powerful emotion in his eyes, such intensity that it felt like I was being pulled into a different world. Without saying anything, he sat down next to me, handing me the drink, which I knew instinctively was whiskey.

“How did you know this is what I craved?” I asked, trying to be a little playful.

He chuckled and glanced at the fountain. “I know more about you than you think I do.”

“Okay. Then tell me about the real Evangeline since I’m no longer certain what I’m made of.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it. You do know exactly who you are and where you want to go in your life.”

“Go for it.”

“You’ve always wanted independence, enjoying the thought of being in the spotlight to a point but preferring to be the master, the CEO of your organization. I can see you enjoying living on a farm with huge horses and cattle while maybe owning a beach house. Not too big. Not too swanky. Just a place where you can kick up your feet, read a book, and unplug. You’re unconventional in your appreciation of liquor and foods. While you likely adore going to wineries, it’s more about the experienceof the tasting, not the drinking. You can easily fit in with any social group, but you honestly prefer just being a girl in bare feet and jeans, curled up with a dog on one side while your son plays on the floor.”

His words were laced with admiration, something no one else had relayed to me. I adored him for it. As a heavier breeze shifted across us, I tugged hair from my face as I turned toward him. “That’s profound. No one has ever seen me the way I see myself.”

“It’s not rocket science, baby. If anyone would take more than five minutes to get to know you, they’d see how special you are.” Gage’s voice was husky, as always, dripping with lust. But this wasn’t about romance or even sex.

I took a sip of my drink, trying not to be both angry and sad. “When this is all over, what do you want?”

He seemed surprised by my question. “What do I want?”

As I looked at him, the way he was searching my eyes all over again was so telling yet provided me such strength. “Maybe I should ask, how has this changed you?”

A slight laugh left his mouth, but he didn’t find anything funny about my question. I hadn’t much attention but on this late afternoon, he had the bad boy look down pat. It was as if he’d been transformed into a biker or… no, someone with dark power. I guessed killing people could do that to you.