Page 45 of Shadow Redemption

“Twenty years.”

Ben grimaced and turned to Ruth. “I’m sorry, sunshine.”

Something was seriously wrong. Fear for Ben sent her heart rate into the stratosphere. “Why?”

Instead of answering her question, he glanced at Brent. “You know what needs to be done.”

“Is that what you want?”

“No, but it’s what is best for Ruth. I don’t have a choice, do I?”

She laid her hand on his arm. “What is it? What’s wrong?”

He cupped her cheek with his palm, regret and simmering rage in his eyes. “My worst nightmare has risen from the dead.”

One look at his face and she knew this rage was connected in some way to what he’d promised to tell her when they were alone. She also knew protection was bound in his DNA. If he thought his past was a danger to her, he’d remove himself from the equation to protect her. “What do you plan to do?”

“The only thing I can do to protect you. Resign as your bodyguard.”

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Ben’s heart hurt at the thought of handing over responsibility for Ruth’s safety to another operative, even one he trusted implicitly. He didn’t trust anyone with her life as much as he did himself. But that privilege was slipping through his fingers.

Ruth thought he was a good man. He was so far from her ideal that Ruth would be horrified if she realized the truth. Her belief in Ben made him want to be better than he was. But he knew better. He was dark and deadly, meant to live the shadows, not in the sunshine. Looked like the dream to have Ruth Monihan in his life was just that, an unattainable dream.

He fought down the bitter anger threatening to overwhelm him until he was alone and had time to deal with the specter from his past. Would his past never die? Didn’t matter that the cascade of events wasn’t a result of anything he’d done. He’d had no choice in the matter. He was just a kid at the time, unable to understand the repercussions of a decision that changed his life and dragged him into the ugliest pit imaginable until he’d escaped and taken back his freedom at an unimaginable cost.

Ruth’s hand dropped from his arm and she took a step away from him. The small distance she put between them broke something inside him. He tried to seal up the breach, but it was impossible. Somehow in the past few months, Ruth had burrowed her way into his heart and taken up residence.

She raised her chin as she stared at Ben a moment, then turned to Brent. “Thank you for your help. Send me your bill. I will no longer be requiring the services of Fortress Security.”

Ben scowled and caught Ruth’s arm as she moved toward the door. “What are you doing?”

“I told you.” Her voice was even. “The only bodyguard I’ll accept is you. If you won’t do the job, I’ll go without protection.”

He tightened his grip. “I can’t do the job.”

“What’s the difference?”

“I’m trying to protect you.”

“By abandoning me?”

“I’ll choose your new bodyguard myself.”

Brent stood. “I need some coffee and a short walk to clear my head. I’ll return in fifteen minutes.” He closed the door.

Ruth shook her head, her gaze locked with Ben’s. “It’s you or no one.”

“The stalker or a potential rival for your jobs isn’t your biggest threat right now. I am.”

“You’re also my best protection.”

He hauled her close, deliberately got into her personal space. “Do you think I’d hand off your security to another operative, especially another man, if I didn’t think it was necessary?” Ben bent his head until his mouth was next to her ear. “You should know me better than that. I protect what’s mine.”

Ruth stilled. “Who said I’m yours?”

“You did. You gave me that gift. I’m not letting you take it back.”