Page 46 of Shadow Redemption

“Maybe not, but you’ll give me to another operative.”

That brought a scowl. “Your security, not you.” The thought of another man being responsible for her safety was eating him up inside.

“No.”

“Ruth...”

“Forget it, Ben. We started the media machine this afternoon. By now, news of my new boyfriend is all over the Internet. If you won’t go with me to Mexico, I’ll go without a security detail and spread the word that my boyfriend couldn’t make the trip with me this time due to work conflicts.”

He hissed out a breath, furious at the situation hurting both of them. “Why are you being so stubborn?”

“Because I need you. Only you make me feel safe.” She buried her face against his chest as though embarrassed at her admission.

Another arrow shot into his heart at a new possibility. “Is that why you want to be with me? Safety?” The possibility hadn’t occurred to him before now, a foolish mistake. Why would any good woman want him? Was she like all the others, wanting him for something he could provide rather than wanting Ben for himself?

That brought her head up in a hurry. “Safety is a nice benefit, but that’s not the main reason.”

“What is?”

“You. Your confidence, your heart, your courage and loyalty. You, Ben Martin. You’re right. Another operative could keep me safe, but he’s not you.”

Ben drew in a ragged breath. “I’m not who you think I am.”

She gave a soft laugh. “Who is? I thought I knew who I was until Hugo kidnapped me. Now, I don’t know myself.”

What did that mean? He had nothing to compare the Ruth before Torino to the Ruth after. He had known of her. Anyone who hadn’t heard of Roxanne had to be a hermit living in a cave.

The woman standing in front of him had been strong before Torino got his hands on her. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have survived the worst that life could throw at her and come out the other side of the storm as strong as steel. He’d be honored to have her at his back any time.

When Shadow had snatched her from Torino, Ruth hadn’t panicked or held them back. Despite the trauma she’d suffered, Ruth had been feisty and protective of her sister. She’d even gone so far as to question whether or not Trace was good enough for Bridget. No, that woman wasn’t missing any pieces from her time with the gunrunner.

So, what was he going to do? He couldn’t let her go to Mexico without protection. Someone, maybe more than one person, had placed a target on her back. But if Ben was with her, his past would be a danger to her as well.

Ben released her and stepped away to pace the office. “Don’t ask me to do this.” Yeah, he was begging, but what choice did he have? He wanted her safe. Having him at her side made her more vulnerable than ever.

“Too late.”

“You don’t know the truth about me.”

“You promised to tell me.”

“We don’t have the time or the privacy for that discussion. I’m sure not doing it in here where Maddox’s office is wired for video and sound.”

Ruth’s mouth gaped. “Brent records what’s said and done in his office?”

“We’re a security firm, and Maddox has access to secrets that men would steal and kill for.” He inclined his head toward the small camera in the ceiling at the right-hand corner of the room. “That’s the obvious camera. There are two others that are well hidden. If anyone enters the office, the boss knows about it.”

She glanced uneasily at the camera and shifted closer to Ben. Voice low, Ruth said, “Is he watching and listening to us now?”

“Why would he? He’ll know in a few minutes what I’ve decided to do.”

That brought a frown. “We. This isn’t a monarchy, Martin. We’ll decide what to do.”

“Right. We’ll decide as long as it’s what you want. If not, you’ll fire the lot of us.” He was trying everything he knew to protect her and yet Ruth was forcing his hand. He didn’t have any doubt that she’d do as she threatened and go to her photoshoot without protection.

“Does Brent know about your past?”

“Some. Not all.” No one knew everything. He wasn’t sure he could tell Ruth all the sordid details. Some things shouldn’t be in her head and Ben had no intention of adding to the nightmares she already fought each night.