Page 26 of From the Ashes

“But sitting in this hospital room rotting away is not what Charlie would want you to do with your life.” He gave me a good long look. “Am I wrong?”

My jaw worked as I tried to come up with something to prove to him that hewaswrong. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized he was right. In fact, I could almost hear Charlie’s voice in my ear telling me to go. And I hated it.

“I want you to be wrong,” I finally said.

“I know you do, son. I know.” His thick hand squeezed my shoulder affectionately. “But giving up everything you’ve worked so hard for just to be here the moment Charlie wakes up… it’s just not worth it. And I think he’d agree with me.” He took a long pause. “And… there’s a very good chance he’s going to be inconsolable for some time if… I mean,whenhe wakes up. His entire life has changed and not for the better.”

“That’s why I want to be here though. I want to help him through it!”

“I know you do, Phoenix. And it’s admirable and wonderful in more ways than one. But it’s not going to spare him the pain.”

I turned back to Charlie, staring at his calm, sleeping expression. A tiny voice deep inside of me wondered if he would be better off never waking up. At least, in that way, he’d be spared the horror of knowing everything he had was gone.

But I couldn’t bear the thought of letting him go. Tears rolled down my cheeks the moment the thought crossed my mind.

“What we’re asking you to do is hard and unfair and it never should’ve been like this. But your mother and I would both like to see you continue living. Then, when Charlie wakes up, you can tell him about all your great adventures and the pair of you can go on new ones together. He’s gonna need time to rebuild his life and you’ll have a college education so you can help him with that.”

“I don’t even want to go to college. I hate school. The only reason I ever agreed to go and worked so hard for those scholarships is because I knew Charlie would be there.”

“And wouldn’t it be disrespectful to let all that work go to waste? Especially when he stayed up countless nights with you helping you prep for entrance exams?”

I nodded. He had a point.

“Charlie’s lost his scholarship and his chance at a normal life. At least for a little while.”

“That wasn’t his fault.”

“No, it wasn’t,” Ted replied. “But it will be your fault if you throw yours away. And I doubt Charlie will forgive you easily for that. I know how badly he wanted you to go on and be a successful writer.”

“I don’t feel much like writing,” I sighed. “Not anymore.”

“I think you should writemorenow.” The hand lifted off my shoulder as Ted headed for the door. “That way, when Charlie wakes up, you can read your book to him. I’m sure he’d love to hear it.”

He was right. Charlie always loved listening to my stories, even when they were only half finished. We used to sit around the campfire for hours dreaming up fantasy worlds, creating epic romances, and solving the darkest mysteries of the world. It didn’t matter what I was working on, Charlie loved every minute of it.

“Ted?” I called.

His footsteps stopped and I turned to look at him standing in the door.

“I… I’ll go,” I said at last. “I’ll go to school like you and Mom want me to. But only on one condition.”

“Name it.”

“You have to call me themomentCharlie wakes up, okay?”

Ted just smiled. “Phoenix… we would’ve done that anyway.”

A sad smile pulled at my lips as I nodded, my cheeks still wet with tears. Ted nodded back and left the room, probably going to look for my mother and tell her the news. I had no doubt she would be happy about it even if that still made me more than a little angry.

“I won’t be far away, okay Charlie?” I lifted his hand to my lips, kissing each of his fingers one after the other. “I’ll never be far away from you. All you have to do is tell me you need me, and I’ll be right there.” I pulled his hand to my chest, placing it over my heart. “We’re not over yet. Not by a long shot. So don’t you give up on me.”

I stood up, leaned over the bed, and kissed him softly on the forehead.

And then I left the room for the last time.

CHAPTER 10

Charlie