Page 34 of From the Ashes
I let out a strained laugh. “Sequel? What sequel?”
“Don’t tell me you haven’t even started it yet,” Tony sighed. “You know the publisher wants at least two more from you! They really want to put out a full trilogy now with how well the first book has done!”
Thepublisherwanted a lot of things. It seemed like every time I turned around they had another demand for me. The demand for a sequel or two, however, had not been baked into my contract. For that I was eternally grateful. That being said, they did write in the right of first refusal. So, no matter what I ended up writing next, it had to go to them first. I could only take it elsewhere if they turned it down. And that included publishing it myself. My pen, whatever it ended up creating next, belonged to editors and their money-grubbing stockholders. Sometimes it made me feel like my writing career had already been bought and sold out from underneath me.
But, if I didn’t write another book, they couldn’t take it from me. Then again, another half a million wouldn’t hurt my bottom line at all. It was that internal struggle that ate up most of my waking hours.Do I embrace the corporate world and make a shit ton of money? Or should I stay true to the spirit of creativity and do it solely because I loved it without financial gain?
“Earth to Phie,” Tony said, waving his hand in front of my face.
“What?” I looked up at him, my eyes dry from forgetting to blink for the past minute. “Did you say something?”
“Were you thinking about the sequel or just ignoring me?”
“Uh… both I guess.”
Tony shook his head, his hand riding higher on my thigh. “Well, if you’re not going to work on your sequel, then maybe I can find a way to get your attention.”
His hand moved higher, his thumb caressing my cock through my jeans. Somehow, even when soft, Tony always seemed to knowexactlywhere it was. The guy had a dick magnet in his hand, I swear.
“The driver isrightthere,” I hissed, nodding my head in his direction.
“He’s got headphones in.” Tony moved his hand up further, cupping my junk, completely unbothered that we weren’t alone. “And a rearview mirror so he can watch.”
I pulled his hand away. “You are relentless.”
He didn’t let go of my hand though. “Come to the back then. Maybe I caninspireyou to write with my mouth.”
My gaze was drawn down to the tent in his slacks. I could tell from the outline in the fabric that he wasn’t wearing underwear. The man was such a slut. And somehow, always prepared to be as slutty as possible.
“You’re going to suck me off while I write?” I joked, turning my gazeback up at him.
“If that’s what it takes for you to make us both even richer, then I’ll happily do my part.”
“I knew that’s all you wanted this bus for,” I muttered, getting to my feet. “Are you sure you didn’t talk finance into the bus just so we could fuck our way across the country?”
“You’ll never know.” He shrugged, pulling me toward the back. “Besides, there’s something really romantic about riding a cock while you’re doing eighty down the freeway, isn’t there?”
“Well, now I know whyyoudon’t write the books.”
He turned back, wrapping his hands around my waist and working his fingers under the waistband of my jeans. “Mr. McKean, you can either fuck me or sign books until we go to bed. Make your choice.”
I let out a sigh, pretending to be a lot more put out than I actually was. “IguessI’ll fuck you. If that’s what it takes.”
“I’m glad my ass is just about as boring as signing books.”
“It’s only marginally better.”
“You’re a dick,” he grinned, wrapping his hand around the back of my neck. “Now will you please shut up and fuck me?”
I nodded, allowing him to pull me into the back of the bus and close the door behind us. It was meaningless fun and we always had a good time. But once the deed was done, and the lights were out, I caught myself staring up through the skylight at the stars shining in the night sky. Tony snored softly beside me, the warmth of his body pressed against my side. It was comforting, not being alone. But not much. Not because Tony wasn’t a good friend or a great lay, but because he wasn’t the man I wanted. He wasn’t the one thatshouldhave been lying beside me in my bed, celebrating this incredible success I’d found.
He wasn’t Charlie.
I shook my head, the name echoing against the inside of my skull. Usually, I did my best not to say it aloud, even in my own thoughts. But tonight, exhausted and staring up at the stars, I found myself recalling those long nights next to the creek. A fire crackled, warming my feet and my best friend in the whole world sat beside me, his shoulder resting against mine. We’d stare up at the stars, dreaming of life and everything it would hold for us. How we would face it together, hand in hand.
Forcing the vision away, I tore my eyes away from the stars and turned over, pressing my back to Tony’s. For all the dreams I’d had as a kid, only one of them had come true. And now that I had it, I realized how little it meant without Charlie at my side.
But I guess I’d just have to get the fuck over it, right? Because Charlie made it very clear, he didn’t want me.