Page 63 of From the Ashes

“Do… Do you want to go on a date?” I asked before I could help myself.

His smile widened, the pink blush of his cheeks turning deep red.

“Yeah,” he nodded. “I think I’d like that.”

CHAPTER 27

Charlie

Inever dreamed I’d see the day where Nix was sitting across from me at the small diner in town, his hair perfectly quaffed and his shirt buttoned all the way to the collar. He sat stiff and poised, like he was trying to be on his best behavior. All I could do was giggle at his formality and fidget with the opal arrowhead around my neck. We’d known each other our entire lives and now, just because we were on a date, he was acting weird.

It was also the first time I’d been inside a restaurant in years. Although we’d chosen a quiet time to go, there were still a few tables occupied. It created enough chatter that I found myself feeling somewhat trapped. My hands were shaky and my heart rate was elevated, but I focused on keeping my breathing steady. And staring at the handsome scruffy face sitting across from me was definitely helping to keep me distracted.

“I haven’t been here since we were kids,” I said at last, breaking the silence we’d been sitting in since we arrived. “It’s smaller than I remember.”

“I think we just might be bigger,” Nix chuckled nervously. He reached up, pulling at his collar. “Is it hot in here or is it just me?”

“Here,” I said, leaning across the table. I reached out, slipping my fingers under the collar of his shirt and popping not one or two, but three buttons. “That should help.”

Nix blushed a deep red, glancing down at his shirt. “Th-Thanks.”

“You can relax,” I added, taking my shaky hands back. “I’m nervous enough for the both of us.”

Nix reached out, grabbing my hands and holding them on the surface of the table. “I’m right here, okay? If you need to leave, just tell me. I won’t be upset.”

“I think I’m okay for now.” I patted the breast pocket of my flannel that I’d worn despite it being over ninety degrees outside. “I brought one of my ‘oh shit’ pills just in case things go sideways.”

“Do you use those a lot?”

I shook my head. “They’re really addictive, so it’s for emergencies only. I think I’ve taken maybe a dozen in the past few years. It has to be really bad.”

“Like that night we ran into each other at the creek?”

“Y-Yeah,” I said, scratching the back of my head nervously. “Sorry about that. You shouldn’t have had to deal with that.”

“Charlie,” he said sternly, squeezing my hands reassuringly. “Iwantto deal with you. I wouldn’t have come back if I didn’t.”

“I just don’t want to be a burden.”

“You couldneverbe a burden to me.”

I smiled because I knew he meant it. But I couldn’t help feeling like it was a naive gesture. He didn’t know how bad things could get orhow long they could go on. Sometimes a depressive state hit me and it lasted for months. Other times I might have low-grade panic attacks for days on end while I slowly became intolerable. I couldn’t help feeling like I was lying to him by not laying everything out on the table right then and there. Would he want to stay once he found out how utterly broken my brain was?

“Charlie,” Nix said, reaching out and brushing my cheek with his thumb. “Come back to me.”

His touch broke the chokehold my brain had over me and I shook my head. “S-Sorry.”

“It’s okay. Just try not to overthink it. I’ve wanted to be here with you for a long time and I like you regardless of your condition. That’s all there is to it.”

Those words filled my chest with warmth and affection. I leaned closer, wanting to kiss him. But just then I heard a voice from the past, calling out over the din.

“Well, well. If it isn’t the fairies from high school all grown up.”

We both looked up to see Jordan Peterson strolling towards us from the other side of the diner. Except, it wasn’t the Jordan I remembered. In high school he’d been fit, confident, well groomed, and handsome even though I hated to admit it. But the man that staggered toward us now was unkempt, unshaved, his hair was a mess, and he had a potbelly. When he reached our table and the stench of cheap beer washed over us, I realized why. However, as I scowled up at him, I saw that same cruel glint in his eye that had always been there. He might not look much like the Jordan I used to know, but it was definitely him.

“What the hell do you want?” Nix growled, keeping one hand tight around mine. “Fuck off,Jordan.”

“Woah! No need to be so hostile there, friend!” he slurred. “I just wanted to say hello!”