Page 70 of From the Ashes
Phoenix
“You’re sure you don’t want to go?” I asked, stopping at Charlie’s front door. We’d just gotten back from a day out wading through the creek looking for arrowheads and I wasn’t quite ready to say goodbye just yet. “You don’t have to be part of the speech or anything. You can just watch.”
“I can’t, Nix,” he replied, his tone apologetic and maybe a little exasperated. I’d been bugging him to go for a couple days now. “I’m just not ready to be in a car just yet.” He gave a wary glance at the abandoned SUV in his driveway. “It… It scares me too much.”
I wanted to argue with him. To tell him that the accident with his mom was a one in a million chance. Hell, he was probably more likely to get struck by lightning on a cloudless day than have something like that happen again. But how could I ever convince him of that? It was easy for me to tell him not to worry. But for Charlie, the impossible had already happened, and he was waiting for it to happen again.
“Alright,” I sighed at last. “I understand.” I gave him a quick grin. “Would you go if we took my motorcycle instead?”
He laughed at that. “You willneverget me on that bike, Phoenix. Ever.”
“You and my mother,” I laughed. “The pair of you are so freaked out by that motorcycle.”
“She worries about your safety.” He turned his gaze to the ground, shifting uncomfortably. “And… so do I.”
“I promise I’ll be safe. Don’t worry.” I lifted his chin with my forefinger, giving him a kiss. “You’re sure you won’t go with me?”
“You’re making me feel guilty,” he said softly, his smile fading.
“Don’t feel guilty,” I replied, trying to stop my words from doing further damage. “It’s not that this speech is important or anything. Actually, it’s probably better that you don’t go. It’s gonna be boring as fuck.” I wrapped my arms around him, holding his body close to mine. “I just want to stay here with you is all.”
“You’ll haveTony.”
I pulled back, chuckling. “Who’s the jealous one now, huh?”
“I’m not jealous!”
“Uh-huh. That’s why you make a face every single time I say his name.”
“I just… I don’t know what kind ofmoralshe has. What if he tries to seduce you?”
“I’m stronger and heavier than him. I’ll just throw him.”
“Yeah, but what if–”
“Charlie,” I said, holding his face with both hands. “Nothing is going to happen between him and I. We both respect one another’sboundaries and we’re just friends now.” I kissed him again, trying to assuage his fears. “Besides, I have a boyfriend now.”
Charlie looked suddenly worried. “Who?”
“You, ya dummy!”
The concern on his face melted into a smile. Then it slowly shifted into terrifying realization.
“If you don’t want the label, we can wait,” I added quickly, worried I’d gone too far. “I wasn’t trying to rush you into anything. I didn’t think before I said it. Sorry.”
A hand came up, pulling my gaze back to him. “I like it,” he said at last. “I’m just surprised.”
“Surprised?” I scoffed. “How could that be surprising? I’ve been wanting to date you since the ninth grade!”
“I just… I know it’s been a nice week with you, but I guess I didn’t expect it to go any further. I thought you’d visit, we’d talk about stuff, and then you’d go home. And maybe, if I was really lucky, you’d care about me from afar, visiting when you could.” He shook his head. “I never expected you to want a relationship with me.”
“You’re the most wonderful man I know,” I replied, stroking his cheek with my thumb. “And the most beautiful.”
His hands were shaking as they came to rest on my shoulders. I could feel his pulse pounding in his neck and the shallowness of his breath.
“Can… Can I have some time to think about that?” he asked at last. “It’s not that I don’t want to,” he added quickly. “Just that I need to process it and calm down a bit.”
“Of course.” I pulled my hands away, giving him the space he needed. “Take your time. I like you a lot, Charlie. You’re worth waiting for.”