Page 34 of When Night Falls
“Just say my name. I’ll come. Or there’s always your cell phone. My number is saved.”
“You have a cell phone?” Her question comes innocently in a curious tone, and it’s cute for her to ask such a strange thing.
“I’m a vampire, Lucynda. I’m not allergic to technology,” I quip but I don’t get anything more than the tired eyes she’s been fighting for hours now.
“I’ll think over your offer and you give me space until I’m ready, deal?”
“Two days, Lucynda or I will come for you.” I make sure she hears my demand, and she nods her head. Little does she know, I have no intention of letting her say no. I'm only entertaining her request in hopes she'll decide all on her own that this is what she wants.
She starts to walk off toward the path. I thought about offering her a ride from my driver, but I know more than anyone that my little one loves a thought-provoking walk.
Before she gets too far, she turns back around to face me.
“Rivian? You said that you’d get a queen out of this whole thing. A queen and what else?”
“Power,” I tell her. Knowing that she doesn’t need the long version or the real truth about my intentions at this point, it isn't significant enough to her.
“And what would I get out of this?”
I watch as Lucynda’s eyes stare at me, reflecting the brilliantly broken girl I craved to capture. But now, as she ventures into the idea of actually marrying me, I know that I might lose focus.The image of her standing at the altar in a wedding gown flips through my brain and embeds itself like a disease.
But I form the truthful, yet easy answer to her question, knowing that what I’m about to tell her is more important to her than the frivolous idea of love or the truth that I seek, which providentially is the same exact thing.
“Revenge.”
14
to be a soulmate
Lucynda
October 14th
I slept the entire day away yesterday, not even really thinking about much. I opted to give my body the rest to decide if it were all to be a dream.
It was not.
I wake up this morning wanting to do nothing but overthink, analyze and talk to Rivian. Twenty-four hours proving to be not long enough for me to miss his presence, cynically enough.
Still, I'm lost at what the right thing to do is. Maybe there is no right thing and maybe there is onlythis. Afterall, I'd for so long wanted to escape my life of pain and the memory of being so insignificant to those around me. I've even laid in this very bedand dreamt up vengeance for those who have hurt me, laughing at the idea that I could be so cruel.
But Rivian gave me a promise. Or at least he claims it's what I have to look forward to if I take his hand in marriage, while he gains power and a queen.
Revenge.
It sounds sweet and it's what I've wanted for so long, isn't it? The idea that I could actually enact misery onto those who have fucked me over; truly making them feel the way their wrath was inflicted on me.
But the more I think about it, the more I realize that I am not a vengeful person. I couldn't possibly want to sink as low to the levels of those assholes. Besides, the biggest monster has already been slayed and it was all because of Rivian.
He killed my father.
He heard me. Saw me. And he…
Something dark ignites in me and I can't explain what that means to me. It's scary to think that someone murdered for me. To know that people like Rivian exist in the world, who can kill for no one and everyone, for any reason or for none. But he killed my disgusting father for me and that means everything to me.
I'm free because of him.
As I get ready for work—a reality I know I have to face giving up if I choose this life—I think about how even if I don't want to move forward with his offer of revenge, I might still want to go through with it if only to repay him for what he's done. Or maybe, I might be able to find more out of this life. Purpose. Family. Love.