Page 94 of When Night Falls
I tell her with my mind, deciding to answer her back. I can see her twitch with confusion before she smiles in pride. She looks between me and the priest carefully. It's been a while since I've been in her head like this. But I know she misses it. I miss it.
You're not mad?
I smirk. She's still seeking my approval or denial. Maybe she wants to be punished. But lord knows she could have anything if she asked me for it right now. Fuck my agenda. I have time to figure out how to make this work. How to make her so unbelievably mine, while still having my revenge. Maybe I don't have to choose. Because holy shit, I would flatten the Earth if she wanted me to at this point. My mind seems clouded by the essence of Lucynda.
I'm proud of you, Lucynda. How does it feel to have all these eyes on you but to know that you belong to me?
She tries to suppress her squirm. All eyes really are on her and part of me wonders if she likes it, considering how hard I made her come last night even when she thought others were watching.
I know you don't love me. I know this is all for appearance and for the kingdom. But I can't wait to be your wife, Rivian. I'm sorry for testing you like that.
What the fuck?
I have to demand myself the power not to choke on my own breath. We've been fighting this insatiable war of power, anger, and lust. But this . . . her sweet sentiment, it's not what I was expecting. I try to manipulate my way back into her thoughts tosee if she's playing with me. But the way her eyes look up at me, waiting for me to respond to her is what makes me retreat. She wants me to trust her. And Ineedher to trust me.
Don't apologize, sweet sin. I…
My attempt to admit my own apology for leaving her the way I did last night, is cut off when the priest asks for us to present the rings.
Lucynda has a look of panic on her face, probably knowing she doesn't have a ring for me. But Troy steps up from behind her and hands her the silver band in which Cyn takes and visibly relaxes.
At the same time, Zharus hands me the ring I've picked out for her.
She repeats after the priest, reciting the scripted vows before stepping forward slightly to place the ring over my finger.
I can see her hands shaking, and part of me wants to soothe her. Tell her that everything will be okay. But that would be a lie.
The priest directs his words onto me now, and I follow the lead.
When I look at her, I see my wife. And she wants to love me. But she doesn't want to take the plunge if I won't reciprocate it back. And what she doesn't understand is thatwon'tandcan'tare two different things.
I grab her hand, letting my thumb make little circles over her skin before slowly sliding the ring onto her finger.
I can't love you, little one.
Disappointment washes over her face as the ring slides another inch.
Why not?
Panic fills her eyes as the ring finds its final home on her finger.
Because it will break you.
31
hopelessly devoted
Lucynda
I twist the diamond ring that Rivian placed on my finger. It really is just as pretty as he promised. It's a white gold band with a pear-shaped diamond but the thing that makes it stand out . . . the diamond is a deep red color causing the ring to look like a single drop of blood.
Rivian's words settle deep in my core, twisting like a knife. Why I let the disappointment take over is a mystery to me because deep down, I knew he'd never love me. No one ever does. But he has to be an idiot if he says he can't feel the connection we have, I know he feels the fire burning between us.
You are wanted, Lucynda.
Fuck, I let him in to my mind and now he won't leave. Great.
The priest finishes up whatever the hell he has to say. I can feel hundreds of eyes staring at me as I probably look like I just saw a ghost. I hate that he’s making me feel sadness while goingthrough this wedding. He could have said literally anything else but he had to choose the one thing that would sting the most.