Page 14 of Beyond the Blues
“It’s been good so far. I just grabbed a coffee and now I’m walking back to the resort.” My mum’s face seems to be laced with concern.
“What?!” I question
“I’m just saying, if you want to come home early, me and Dad will help pay.” I scoff. The fire in my stomach sets alight, the frustration fuelling me.
“I can go on a trip alone, Mum!”
“I know it’s just…” She sighs.
“You used to do it with Coco. It’s just not your forte being alone.” Her words feel like a punch to the gut. I have been alone. This entire morning I’ve spent alone, doing things for myself. I mean, I have been hanging out with Nora, but that’s not my entire trip. Maybe I need to do things alone.
“Think I’m going to go now.” I say bluntly, and before my mum can respond, I hang up the call feeling bad, but I’d feel worse if I said something I don’t mean. I contemplate back and forth whether to stop this thing going on between me and Nora before it’s too late.
“Hello trouble.” I look up and see Nora at the entrance of the resort, cigarette in hand, bed head on.
“Hey.” I mumble, unsure of what to do with this situation.
“What’s up?”
“I think this thing we have going on needs to stop.” Nora shakes her head in disbelief, stubbing out her cigarette underneath her foot.
“May I ask why?”
“Well, I came to Greece not only for Coco but to gain more independence and my mum thinks I can’t do it and basically-”
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BEYOND THE BLUES
“Ophelia.” Nora interrupts my rambling.
“You can still be independent and hang out with people, you know that, right?”
“But being independent is about being alone?”
“No, independence is about having the freedom to do what you want, not what your mum wants, or what I want, or what anyone wants. It’s about what you want.”
I take in what Nora says, and really consider it. Most of my life, I just go with what other people say about me and not what I want to do.
Ophelia, you want to go to university! So I go.
Ophelia, let’s go here. It’ll be fun! So I go. Most of my life, I have followed what others want from me, to make them happy and not necessarily myself. Especially since Coco has passed, the people around me have been telling me what’s ‘right’ for me and the best way to ‘get over this’, but the only person who truly knows what’s best for me is me.
“You’re right.” I lean into Nora for a hug, her arms cocooning me into her chest.
“Had a tough morning?” I nod into her chest.
“I fed some cats, though.” I mutter.
“Of course you did” Nora chuckles, stroking my hair.
38
8
Chapter 8
Nora and I are sitting by the pool, talking about our mornings over frozen cocktails. Mine is a strawberry daiquiri and Nora’s a pina colada.