Page 112 of Tormented Kings

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Page 112 of Tormented Kings

I get up off Declan’s lap and stand, moving to crowd Preston’s space. My stomach twists into knots, everything he just said making my head spin. But this needs to happen.

“I like you, Preston.” I laugh. “Despite how you’ve treated me, I’ve liked you for a long time. I saw the broken boy inside you, and I knew the facade you put on, that the way you treated me wasn't who you really were. Because I’ve seen the real you, Preston. Every time we would sit in that tower, I saw the broken boy who just wanted to be loved. I wanted to do that for you. I wanted to be there,” I sob. “But you wouldn’t let me. I’m broken, too, you know. So damn broken, you don’t even know. And someday, I’ll tell you.” I wipe my tears. “But if you want me, Preston, here I am. All you have to do is work for it, take the steps to prove you want me. I’m right here.”

“It’s not that easy,” he says, sounding so broken.

“We’re going to put an end to your father,” I promise him. “You will be free, Preston. I can’t tell you when or how, but if you're willing to make the sacrifices the others have to make this work, then I’m here.” My voice lowers to a whisper. “I like you, Preston. Even though everything that’s happened between us was warning me away, I ignored it because I know who you are deep down. Give me that man. Let me help you be that man. Letushelp you.”

Both of our chests heave, both sets of eyes wet with tears. I feel open and raw, and I’m sure he feels just the same. I wantto tell him how proud I am of him for finally letting us in, for coming to us with his worries and pain.

He takes a step towards me, but I take a step back, causing hurt to flash in his eyes. “We are nothing without Declan,” I tell him. “I won’t even entertain the idea of us being something more unless you two settle whatever happened on Halloween night and everything else since.”

Preston’s eyes flick over to Declan. I turn to see him sitting there, body rigid as he stares down at the ground, eyes red like he’s about to cry.

I wanna go over there and comfort him, but the person who should be doing that goes over to him and gets down on his knees before him.

“Declan,” Preston’s voice is soft and pleading. “Look at me, please.”

Declan lifts his eyes, nostrils flaring as he tries to keep things under control.

“I’m so fucking sorry for the night of the party. You didn’t deserve to be treated like that. And it kills me that I hurt you. I need you to know that I love you. I’m not ashamed of it. I don’t wish things were different. I’ll be honest: coming to the reality of my sexuality came at the worst time in my life. I was drowning in my own self-hatred and misery. I didn’t hate myself for being bi, I hated myself for falling for another person I couldn’t have. Another person I’ve let down.” He places his hands on Declan’s thighs.

Declan doesn’t look away, his lower lip wobbling. I stand there and watch, my eyes stinging, still shocked that this is all really happening right now.

“I want to be with you. I want to be with both of you. To love you, to take care of you, to be the man you deserve. But I don’t know how to do that, not while my father has me by the throat. But I know I can’t keep pushing you away. I don’t want to denymy feelings for you, either. I don’t deserve you. Either of you. But I want you. I want to be worthy of you both. I’d understand if you can’t forgive me for the things I did, but I need you to know that I’m sorry, and if I could take the words back that broke your heart, I would.” Preston lowers his head, closing his eyes. “I’m scared. I’m so fucking terrified. Not just of what my father would do if he found out about my feelings for you and Sadie. But for giving in to them. I’m not good at being affectionate or romantic. And though I love you both, I don’t know how that’s supposed to work. I’ve never seen love. Not until I saw the way you two are with each other.” He lifts his head again. “I want that,” he whispers, his voice raw. “I want that with both of you together, with you individually.” His voice cracks, and god, so does my heart with his next words. “I just want to love and be loved.” He hangs his head as if he’s ashamed for even thinking he deserves it.

My hand moves to my mouth as I smother a sob that wants to rip free. Tears spill down my cheeks as my heart races in my chest. This man, he’s so fucked up because of his parents. He deserved so much better. He was never a bad guy, just dragged down by the evils of his world. The evils within the four walls of his home.

Declan’s eyes are filled with sorrow and love as he parts his lips, blinking a few times. His eyes flick up to mine, and I give him a sad smile, letting him know I’m okay with whatever he chooses.

Declan looks down at Preston and grips him by the chin, lifting his head up so he can look at him.

“You are loved,” Declan whispers, giving him a soft smile. “You’ve just hated yourself too much to see it. But you don’t need to hate yourself anymore, Preston. We don’t. We never could. We love you. We want to be with you, to fight by your side—with you, not against you. Let us love you even if you don’tlove yourself. Let us be there for you. Let us be your strength. You don’t have to do this alone anymore.” Declan leans in and presses a kiss to Preston’s lips.

The whimper that escapes Preston has me squeezing my eyes shut from another wave of tears. Preston wraps his arms around Declan’s waist and starts to cry, holding on to him like he’s seconds away from falling apart and Declan is his lifeline.

Declan grabs the back of Preston’s head, holding it to his chest, and kisses the top of it before looking at me, tears trailing down his cheeks. I move to kneel behind Preston and wrap my arms around him from behind.

It makes Preston cry harder, and I join him.

I cry with him for all the times his father hit him. All the times he made Preston feel like he’s worthless. For all the time, his dad was cruel, and for every second, he was forced to do all the things he hates by his father's hand.

Declan plays with my hair, patting my head as he rubs Preston’s back.

I’m not sure how long we sit here like this, soaking in each other's touch before Preston’s phone rings.

I move so that he can grab it from his pocket. He takes a look and curses before putting his forehead on Declan’s knee.

“I have to go,” he says in a hollow voice. He takes in a big, exhausted breath before looking up at us. “It’s my father asking me where I am. I’m supposed to be going over to...” He blinks a few times, wiping at his eyes as he stands.

“To Tina’s?”

“Fuck.” Preston scrubs his hands with his face. “Fucking fuck!” He shakes out his head. “I don’t want to. Please know I don’t want to.” He looks between us with pleading eyes.

“Hey.” I put my hand on his arm. “We understand. We’ll figure it out.”

“This isn’t over.” He looks between us. “I have more I want to say.”

“And we want to listen,” Declan replies, standing up and coming to my side.




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