Page 98 of Gambler's Conceit
“Nobody’s making you do anything,” Havoc promises. “You know I hate being told what to do.”
I sniffle, almost managing a smile through my tears. “Yeah,” I say.
He strokes my hair, and I start to calm down. I don’t know if it’s the scent of the balm Caleb’s using on my back, or the touch, or Havoc’s hard hold on me. Maybe it’s all of it.
Maybe I’m just realizing they’re not going to abandon me even though I didn’t take enough of a punishment.
Only fifteen.
It hadn’t been enough.
I quash my panic even as it threatens to rear its ugly head again.
Vortex returns then, and I peek out to see that he’s carrying fourRoi de Piquebranded sports bottles. “Why don’t you have regular bottled water, Caleb?” he grumbles as he sets three of them down on the dresser.
“Bottled water isn’t very eco-friendly, now is it?” Caleb responds. “I went through all the trouble to upgrade the hotel and casino to be as climate friendly as possible. I’m not going to be a hypocrite in my own home. Filtered tap water is fresher anyway.”
“Oh my god,” Vortex laments. “It’s just—” Caleb must’ve given him a look or something because Vortex gives an exaggerated sigh and concedes, “Yeah, okay.” He stops next to me, handing me one of the sports bottles. “Here you go, Seven.”
I shake my head. “Not thirsty.”
His brows lift, and he continues to hold the bottle out to me. “Did I ask?” he asks dryly.
I shudder, but I open my mouth. Vortex lifts the bottle to my lips and tilts it so I can drink. Some of the water spills when I close my mouth to swallow, but nobody admonishes me or yells at me.
I wipe at the spilled water as unobtrusively as I can, but I know Vortex has seen it.
Only when I really can’t drink anymore does he finally pull back, setting the bottle on the bedside table. “Okay. How do you feel?”
I take a deep breath, trying to figure out the answer to that question. Caleb is still rubbing the cream into my back,and Havoc is still holding me tight. Vortex is close, radiating protective energy. Between the three of them, I almost feel… safe.
“I’m okay,” I tell him. I don’t think I’m lying, either.
Caleb’s hands still, but he doesn’t move them away. “Do you want to sit in Vortex’s lap? With your welts against his chest?”
I shiver at the thought of it, and gratitude fills me at the idea of finding comfort both from being held and having the reminder of the flogging. I nod.
“Move over,” Vortex orders Havoc.
It takes a little bit of jostling, but we manage to shift so that Vortex and Havoc are seated next to each other and I’m in Vortex’s lap. I lean hard against him, my eyes fluttering closed as I feel the way the welts press against Vortex’s chest, but I reach out blindly for Caleb, too.
Thoughts that I’ve suppressed threaten to come up again, reminding me that he’sdangerous, and I snatch my hand back like I’ll be burned if he touches me.
Havoc takes the hand and lifts it up to kiss it. Caleb doesn’t even look hurt by my reaction.
“We just did the easy part,” Caleb says softly. “It’s time for the hard part, Seven. We’re going to have to talk.”
Dread makes my heart plummet into my chest, and I shake my head furiously, turning my head so I can hide my face away. I don’t want to talk.
“Yes,” Vortex says firmly. “We need to understand what happened so we can make sure it doesn’t happen again.”
“We already talked,” I say, looking pleadingly up at him. “Wasn’t that enough?”
“You were afraid, so you went to the bar to get drunk and fuck a stranger,” Caleb says tonelessly. I can’t tell if he’s mad or not, and that puts me more on edge. “Is that correct?”
I nod and avert my gaze. I thought we were done with the punishments.
It’s because it was only fifteen lashes.