Page 37 of Master B-1901
“What did he say? I didn’t hear you ask.”
“I didn’t have to. He knew what I needed. He’s busy at the moment, but he’s getting things set up and sending Nineteen over to escort us. He wants it done in a special room so that I can be monitored in case the worst does happen.” Braddock put the phone in his pocket, glancing up to me. “He doesn’t want you in the room, just in case, but he said you can watch from a one-way window. You can see me. I can’t see you. It’s best that way. I’m not sure I want you in there either. Ally…I’m not okay. What I told the Main Master.” He swallowed hard. “I think something is coming.I feel it.I feel…fuck. I don’t know. It’s in me. It’s eating away just waiting to be set free. Maybe if I can release the aggression, this sensation will pass.”
“We won’t know until you try. I’m hoping this helps. At least you’ll know what to do if the urges become too much. If an outlet works, this could be great news for you.”
But it wouldn’t be because I knew the reasons for his episode, and it had nothing to do with mental health. It was Mistress Two. She was the cause. He’d do better without her altering his mind. I was hoping he’d never have to worry about having another episode again. Of course…hewasfeeling something. An urge to be violent. He wouldn’t even use me, and now I knew why. He was afraid. Afraid of hurting me with whatever waslingering deep in his mind. If the Main Master could help him. If he could?—
“There you go again, disappearing deep in your head. Slave, what is really on your mind? You keep doing this.”
“I’m trying to decide if I should put in a grocery order now or after we’re finished. Maybe I’ll do it now. I can just call and have it delivered when we get home.”
“Groceries? I’m sitting here thinking of murder and you have food on the mind? Unbelievable. This wasyouridea.”
“Murder will make you hungry. Don’t you want to eat afterward?”
“…Put in the order.”
“That’s what I thought.” I forced a smile, placing my hand out for the phone. He handed it over, walking into the bedroom. My mask dropped and I fell back into numbness as I went over the grocery order with the slave on the other end. When Braddock returned, he had on his shoes, but he wasn’t here. Not really. Neither of us seemed the same since Melissa.
Hanging up, I placed the cell on the counter.
“Master. Are you okay? I have to ask. You seem so distracted. These new feelings, are they coming from anything you might remember from your episode?”
Braddock leaned against the counter I still stood behind.
“I’m not sure. When I think back, everything is unclear. I’m not sure what’s real or not.”
I nodded. “But you are seeing things?”
“Yeah. It’s…a big blur of pieces…of. That doesn’t help you, I guess. It’s hard to explain.”
“I think I understand. My mind isn’t the same either. I feel…I…Something is different inside me, and I’m not quite sure what it is.”
“Your mind?”
His lips parted, and I knew my mistake instantly.
“I just mean?—”
“No, wait.” He got quiet, blinking rapidly as he dropped his gaze. “You. Your mind? But?” His head gave a hard shake as a mix of confusion morphed into something darker. “There…wasknocking…wasn’t there?” At my silence, his stare shot daggers into mine. “Answer me. I didn’t imagine it. It wasn’t part of the delusions.Answer.As your Master, I demand it.”
“The Main Master?—”
“Allison, answer me.”
But I couldn’t as his entire personality shifted into a ball of fury and anxiety. My ingrained loyalty wouldn’t let me. My mouth closed and the lock on my jaw wouldn’t budge as Braddock waited.
“Allison.”
“I can’t,” I forced through clenched teeth.
“Was she here? Did we let her in?Did I?”
My lids squeezed shut and he cursed.
“I fucking did. I let her in. Fuck!” The sound of his fist slamming into the counter echoed through the room. “I can’t remember. I can’t…believe…Allison, look at me.”
And I did, but it wasn’t nice. Even silent, I knew I was giving too much away, and I didn’t like that. I was betraying my Main Master, and I was trying my best not to.