Page 12 of Shadow of Death

“I doubt that,” he said. “It’ll go smoother with me along, and I’m sure she knows it too.” The way he said it, with such certainty, made my stomach drop. There was no convincing him otherwise. I realized then that he wasn’t just being stubborn—he truly believed he could make a difference, could protect me from whatever lay ahead. But how could he protect me from the darkness that was already inside me?

Iwanthim to come. Don’t make it difficult,said Death, who had appeared in the farthest corner.

She was staring at Kicks, her eyes fixated on him with an intensity that made my skin crawl. I hadn’t seen a look like thatsince Tiffany, my high school best friend, had a crush on Mr. Billings. He was the hot science teacher every girl swooned over. Tiffany used to sit and go nearly speechless for the entire class. Seeing that look on Death’s face?Unsettlingdidn’t even begin to describe it.

“Fine. Come if you must,” I said.

“So where are we going?” Kicks asked.

“Scotland,” I said.

“Do you know where in Scotland? I have family there.”

“No. She didn’t tell me yet.” I glared at her.This better not be anywhere near his family.

“She’s here now,” Kicks said, his voice low as he turned to look at the spot where I’d just glared.

“Yes.” For some reason, I’d never wanted him to know when she was around, how close she hovered. But was there really a point in hiding it now?

“I’m going,” he said, speaking toward the spot she stood.

Death purred as she looked at him.

Kicks turned back to me. “Does she have a plan on how we’re going to get there?” he asked.

“No. It’s my problem,” I said.

“Ourproblem. I’ll start making calls tomorrow.”

I wanted Kicks there more than I’d ever admit. But a part of me, the part that had already seen too much darkness, knew better. This wasn’t going to be easy. It wasn’t going to be smooth. And no matter how much he wanted to, Kicks couldn’t protect me from what was coming.

“Okay,” I said softly, knowing I was turning on my own beliefs by not fighting this more. But I also feared what she’d do if I tried to stop him.

As I glanced at Death, who was watching us with an unreadable expression, I couldn’t shake the feeling that things were about to get worse.

Chapter Six

I leanedon a tree outside of Charlie’s school, my arms crossed, as I rehearsed what I’d say to him. It was a conversation I’d been replaying in my head for so long, and yet the words still felt like chewing on charcoal. Would he hate me? Worse, would he be scared? He was so little and had already lost so much. It didn’t help that I was disappearing on a regular basis.

I’d thought this time would be easier. This place was his home now, more so than it would ever be mine. He was growing up with a pack that he would probably live with for the rest of his life. He hadn’t just embraced them.They’dembraced him back. He’d be okay, even if I died tomorrow. They loved him as much as he loved them. If I’d done nothing else right, I’d brought him here.

But in spite of everything, it still felt like hell to leave him. Like if I didn’t have this tree holding me up, I’d crumple to my knees.

The door to the school swung open and the yard erupted in yells as the kids ran out like little gremlins being let loose after being confined for so long. My little monster spotted me and came running over. “Can I sleep over at Max’s tonight?”

Max was one of Charlie’s best friends and currently hanging upside down from a branch not far away.

“But you slept over at Phil’s two nights ago?”

“Yeah, but this is Max, and there’s no school tomorrow.” He was staring at me as if he couldn’t fathom how I didn’t see the stark difference in the situation.

“I wanted to talk to you first.” I took a seat on the nearest bench, waving him over with me.

“What’s wrong?” His brow was already knitting, turning my stomach into knots as it did.

“I’m going to have to go on another trip. I’ll be gone for a little while. Where I have to go is pretty far.”

His nose crinkled. “Who’s going to parent me?”