Page 51 of Red Fire
“This is terrible, Creed. Why did you put yourself forward like that? You should have left when you had the chance,” I whisper. “You had an out.” I feel my throat clog. He is risking himself to save me. To help me.
“What? That would mean leaving you here with them. With him. Tank is one of the worst. Most of the shifters were good males who made mistakes. After being banished out here, many of them slowly lost touch with their humanity. They slowly turned more animal than human. They, at least, have an excuse. That isn’t the case with Tank.”
“He’s in full control and pure evil.”
Creed cups my jaw. “He didn’t hurt you, did he?” His face is pulled tight with concern. “Please tell me you’re okay. I can’t scent him on you, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t…hurt you.”
I’m just a few inches away from him.
For a moment, I can’t say anything. It feels intimate.
Then, I manage to pull myself out of it. “No, he didn’t hurt me.” I lick my lips. “More dragons arrived before he could, and I managed to convince them to fight for me in a more structured manner. I was trying to buy time. I didn’t know about the culling games.”
“Beauty and brains.” He traces the tip of his thumb along my jawline and then lets me go.
I do something stupid. I cup his jaw in both my hands, and I kiss him. I gently brush my lips against his, pulling back a tiny bit. “I was worried about you. I thought you had died.” My voice hitches.
“I’m not that easy to kill.” His eyes are on my lips. This time, he leans in and takes my mouth.
I moan softly as he deepens the kiss. I lose myself in the heat of the moment; everything around us seems to fade away. He feels good. He feels so right. His kiss is gentle and yet urgent.
But just as quickly as it begins, Creed pulls away, his breath ragged as he stares into my eyes with a mixture of desire and regret. “We can’t do this. I want to but…”
“Your ribs.” I gently touch his chest, putting my hand flat on his warm skin.
He chuckles softly. “I’d have to be half dead for pain to hold me back,” he says against my mouth. We kiss again. It’s fierce and hungry, our bodies pressed tightly together as we explore each other’s lips, mouths. His hand wraps in my hair.
“It’s Tank’s warning, isn’t it?” I ask as we pull away. “That whole thing about not putting your seed in me.”
He moves away a little further still, and I let his face go. “It’s easier to pick up in our dragon form, but you’re nearly fertile. You will be tomorrow or the next day at the latest.”
“Tank said something along those lines to me.” I get hot with anger at all the awful things he said earlier. “I don’t want to getpregnant. I’m not ready to be a mom. Also, if everything works out, I’ll leave the island soon,” I whisper as softly as I can.
“Exactly, but there’s more to it. Here’s the thing: if any one of us f…has sex with you and comes inside you, they will be put to death. It’s the rules of the culling games. The games then go on, and there is a victor. The victor takes his bride, namely you.”
I shiver at the thought of it being anyone other than Creed. Any one of these guys will want his pound of flesh.
“We may mostly have sons, but we are a fertile species, so the chances of you becoming pregnant would be good.”
“You mean with the child of the person who ended up being put to death? We’re talking theoretically here.”
He nods. “Yep, exactly. The female will carry and birth the child. Her mate can then choose to raise the child as his own…or to kill them. Many over the years have opted for the latter. Our parents told us grisly bedtime stories. It’s a tradition that hasn’t been carried out for many years, but it used to exist. Tank has decided to invoke the old tradition because he’s a vicious bastard and because many of the males present would buy into it in their current base states.”
I gasp. My mouth falls open and goes wider and wider with horror as I listen to what he has to say. “Kill an innocent newborn baby? No…surely not, Creed. That’s barbaric.” And yet, I know it’s true. I watched those episodes on Sundays about animals in the wild who do just that. Lions are notorious for killing offspring that aren’t theirs and then making the lioness pregnant again as soon as possible. There are species of primates and even dolphins that are known to kill infants who are not theirs. It had always shocked me to see it.
He takes my hand. “We’re not all like that. There are a few good males out here. Most of our species are good. I can’t imagine what you must think of us, Octavia. The shifters in the city spend much of their time in their human skins…they are notlike this. Although some of the males out there are bad news, most are good at heart but are being governed by their dragons at present. It’s easier to exist and to thrive out here in our dragon forms. Easier to get around, to hunt, to fight for territory. All of it is easier in scales…but it comes at a cost to our humanity.”
“How is it that you’re still so human?”
“I’ve seen what can happen. I was almost killed on my second day out here in the jungle by a feral male. I promised myself that I would stay in my human form as much as possible. That I would keep working with my hands. I built my cabin and started sculpting wood. I keep myself busy. Keep my mind occupied. I had plans to put in running water and even a toilet. I refused to become a monster. Hurting that male that day…it shamed me. I never want to lose control like that again. I won’t!”
“You’re still beating yourself up over what happened. It’s been three years. You’ve served your time.” I thread my fingers through his, rubbing my thumb up and down the side of his hand.
“It will never be long enough, Octavia. I maimed that male. He has scars and lost vision in one of his eyes. That’s on me. Not Aspen, not anyone else but me. He was there trying to secure a mate.” He sucks in a breath. “Maybe if I win tomorrow and get you back safely to the city, maybe at that point, I will have earned some sort of reprieve. Maybe I’d be able to look at myself again in the mirror. I’ve spent three years trying to learn control. Trying to become a better male.”
“You are a good person. You absolutely will have earned your reprieve. You already have. Please don’t feel like you’re obligated to help me. You don’t have to. You deserve to have a life and to be happy. You need to stop punishing yourself.”
“I’ll never forget Aspen’s screams and how she looked at me with horror.”