Page 49 of Break my Heart
“Ava!”
I blink out of those thoughts before lifting my hand in a wave. For a split second, the tension in my chest loosens.
“Hey, Britt!” It takes effort to force a smile to my face.
She loops her arm through mine as we walk toward the Union, weaving through the dinner crowd. Britt has become my best friend, the one person I can actually be myself around. She gets it—being thrown into the public eye at a young age, her rise to fame, and now her need for something real. Britt left LA to escape the spotlight, and even though I wasn’t a celebrity or household name like her, I understand that craving for a fresh start, for normalcy.
She scrutinizes my face for a long moment. “Is everything okay?”
I glance at her and then away. “Yeah, just tired.”
It’s not a total lie, but it’s nowhere near the full truth. A prick of guilt hits me. I hate lying to her, but I’m not ready to reveal what’s been going on.
“Well, you’ve been juggling classes, skating, and everything else. But don’t forget to take care of yourself too.”
I nod, appreciating her concern, even though I know it’s more than that.
After ordering sandwiches, we scan the space, looking for the rest of the group we’re meeting. As soon as Carina pops up and waves, we navigate through the crowd until we reach a long stretch of table where we settle in.
“I’m so glad you could make it!” Juliette says before digging into her salad. She found out last week that she was accepted into med school. That girl is always at the library studying her ass off.
Well, when she’s not spending time with her hunky boyfriend, Ryder McAdams.
Fallyn’s sparkly engagement ring catches the light and nearly blinds me. It’s a gorgeous ring. Wolf did an amazing job picking it out.
Her attention gets snagged by it for a second or two. “Sometimes I still can’t believe I’m married.” She flashes a smile at Britt. “You too.”
Britt glances at the blingy rock on her own finger. “It’s gone by so quickly.”
The conversations that buzz around me are all normal—comforting in a way—but I can’t help feeling out of place.
“What about you?” Britt asks, nudging me playfully.
I almost choke on my water as an image of Hayes flashes in my brain along with the way he made me feel and how I stupidly opened up to him at the arena. That vulnerability I showed him now feels like a mistake. I haven’t heard from him since, and it stings more than I care to admit.
“Are there any prospects on the horizon?” Viola asks. She and Fallyn are cousins and live together off campus.
I shake my head, forcing a casual smile. “Nope, I’m just focused on school.”
I never should have entrusted Hayes Van Doren with my secrets.
What if he tells his friends, and it spreads like wildfire across campus? That thought is enough to have nausea stirring in the pit of my belly.
“It wouldn’t be a hockey player even if you did,” Stella adds.
Juliette nods. “Your dad would probably lose it.”
I can’t help but grimace.
That’s not a scenario I want to imagine playing out.
“He definitely wouldn’t be thrilled about it.” Even though my parents want me to move on from the past and get involved with a nice boy and have a normal relationship, there’s no way they’d want me to date one of his players.
As tempting as it is to share all that with my new friends, I keep the truth locked up tight where it can’t see the light of day. When it comes down to it, I’m afraid of the judgment I’ll find in their eyes.
If only it were possible to blot out the last three years and pretend it never happened. I’d give anything to be the naïve girl I’d once been.
When my phone buzzes in my pocket again, the muscles in my belly contract until it becomes painful. My appetite vanishes as I shove my sandwich to the side.