Page 53 of Ford

She turned and started walking along the curb. He kept up with her.

“I don’t know what else to do. Gunnar needs… Listen, I told you about the time my mother left me at the diner, right?”

The story still made him want to go back in time and chase after her stupid mother, give her a good shake. Seven years old, left for three days… He managed to keep his voice cool. “Mmmhmm…”

“I stayed with this waitress named Peggy.”

“She gave you a chocolate shake.”

She nudged him with her shoulder. “Good memory.”

Oh, he had a lot of memories from their drive to Idaho. Especially the one where she told him about Gary, one of her mother’s many boyfriends and the man who had abused her.

So yeah, he understood her desire to protect Gunnar.

“I stayed with Peggy for three days. When my mom came back, with Terry, her boyfriend at the time, she and Peggy had a terrible fight, right there in the yard. Peggy threatened to call family services, then the cops—I think she wanted to keep me.”

Scarlett gave him a wan smile. “And in that moment, I wished for her to keep me. But as soon as I wished it, I felt like I’d betrayed my mother. So I told Peggy that I hated her. Then I ran away from her and got into the car. Only after we drove away did I realize I’d left my belongings behind, including a stuffed dog my biological father had given me. It was all I had of him. Not that it mattered—if he really loved me he would have stuck around, but it was something, you know? From him. A reminder that I was somebody’s daughter. And just like that, it was gone. That sense of belonging to someone, or something. And having something that belonged to me. I’ve learned not to look too far ahead, and I’m okay with that. But I want Gunnar to have someone.”

“You have someone, Red.”

Ford didn’t know why he said that, except, well it was true.

Oh, how he wanted it to be true. And when she glanced at him, a little unmasked hunger in her expression, he wanted to stop, turn to her, and show her that.

Except, in a flash, the hunger was replaced with a distant smile. “I know you want to believe that, Ford. But a SEAL’s life isn’t exactly made for, well…anything beyond right now.”

“That’s not true. The smart guys have someone to come home to…”

She looked away. “I can’t be that girl. Waiting at the window for a man.”

And shoot, but he got that too. It felt too much like her mother.

“Right,” he said and balled his fists in his pockets.

They meandered through darkened cobblestone streets, the shops closed. Ford had gotten them rooms in the hotel Ham had suggested, smack in the middle of Old Town Square, not realizing it overlooked a Gothic cathedral, with black spires and the sense of doom looking down at him. As if God was reminding him to keep his head in the game.

“You can’t give me promises, Ford, and frankly, I wouldn’t expect you to. Life is…unpredictable. You can’t count on anything but right now.” She tossed him a sad smile. “And you’re not a right now guy, are you?”

Oh. Their conversation in Montana. When she’d kissed him, offered him herself.

“I’m not a one-night-stand guy, Red,” he said again, now.

“And I’m not a one-night-stand girl.” She glanced up at him. “Usually.”

“I know,” he said quietly. And he did. Red was too careful, too smart. What she’d offered him had meant something to her.

And because she meant something to him, he wanted to wait.

His voice softened, and he took her hand. “What if you were the girl I came home to every night?”

He thought it sounded romantic, but she looked away, a sad resignation on her face. “I’m not the girl on the sidelines either.”

He wanted to wince. Yeah, nice, Ford. Because he knew that about her too. Probably, her courage and desire to be in the fray were what drew him to her.

Not easy when the woman next to him stirred up his own broken places.

“I know you’re not, Red. I just…you scared me today.”