Page 10 of Rage's Solace
Chapter 4
Priscilla
Two Weeks Later
Ican’t believe that I’ve been cut off, abruptly and permanently from support by my deceased husband’s father. After suffering for ten long years with this man, I don’t get any kind of support whatsoever. The worst part is, there is nothing I can do about it, though truthfully, we are better cut off from that family. Conrad and his father had known all along that Mia wasn’t their blood. I couldn’t tell them the truth, that shewastheir blood, because then I would have to reveal what had happened with Ashton. The fact that once I was married to Conrad he backed off, was enough. So I allowed them to believe that the baby was Ray’s, I was forced to sign a prenup acknowledging that I came to him four months pregnant by another man. At the time, they told me not to worry, that Conrad would treat her like his own daughter and the family would welcome her with open arms. They kept their word about being good to Mia. It was me his family had a problem with. The bottom line is, there will be no child support forthcoming. And there are no marital assets because nothing of value was in Conrad’s name. I should have paid more attention to our finances but anytime I asked questions, Conrad always told me not to worry, that it was being taken care of.
That means it’s up to me to recover fast and step up to provide for my daughter. Sitting here with my discharge instructions in hand, I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders. I need to suck it up and get my ass in gearbecause my daughter needs me. I can’t let her see me as weak and depressed. Therefore, I muscle fears for our future down and lock my worries away in a little box in the back of my mind. Waiting to leave is the hardest part because it’s hard not to start worrying again.
When Raymond and Mia show up, they’re all smiles, rainbows, and sunshine. It lifts my spirits a little. When Mia moves in for a hug, I gaze over her shoulder at Ray. He was seriously hot when we dated in high school. Now that he’s fully grown, he’s even more attractive. He’s always had broad shoulders, but now he’s packed on the muscle. I’m still having trouble believing he’s back after thinking he was dead for so long. If he was alive all along, then why didn’t he contact me? I haven’t broached the subject with him even though I have a million questions. It’s like we’re tiptoeing over the past.
“What’s the plan today, Prissy?”
It stabs at my heart that he still calls me by the nickname he tagged me with all those years ago. I hold up my discharge paperwork, “I’ve officially been discharged but I need to pick up a few medications.”
“Are you up for getting a bite to eat,” Ray asks.
I give him a quick smile. “Only always. I’ve been craving a burger and some fries after this healthy hospital food.”
He grins down at me. “You should have said. I’d have brought you that.”
I shrug, “Fries are only good for a few minutes. They’re always crappy take out and never warm up very well.”
He replies chipperly, “You are not wrong about that. Let’s get you packed up and outta this miserable excuse for a rejuvenating spa resort.”
I smile at his enthusiasm and Mia giggles. She likes his sense of humor, and I just like him full stop. If I’m honest, those old feelings never died. They always say if the person you love dies then the love never does, it just changes. That happened over the years, but now he’s here again I feel the old pull. But as he’s been nothing but friendly with me, I lock my heart down and slap a smile on my face, because this man does not deserve my angst. He’s the one doing us a gigantic favor by taking us in until I can get back on my feet.
When the nurse comes to take me down in a wheelchair, she calls Raymond a different name, Rage. And she flirts shamelessly with him. Although he doesn’t encourage her by any stretch of the imagination, he doesn’t shut her down either. That shouldn’t bother me, that this gorgeous single man has women chasing after him, but it does. It bothers me a lot. That feeling I’m experiencing is jealousy. I quickly realize that I’m experiencing a lot of big emotions where this man is concerned, where there used to be only grief.
Once I’m settled in his truck he closes the door. The window is cracked open, and I can hear every word they’re saying.
She says, “The last time I texted you, I didn’t get an answer.”
He runs his hand through his hair before answering her. “I’ve been busy, Mariam. I have a lot on my plate right now.”
“So, you had no time in the last six weeks to get back to me?”
“Look,” he replies. “I know you’re looking for a relationship.”
“What’s wrong with that? We were good together,” she says and places her hand on his shoulder.
He shifts away, “We spent the weekend together. It’d be weird to make long term plans off one weekend together.”
“I’m not suggesting that we get engaged. I just think you should give me a chance. I’m a nice person. It could lead to something wonderful.”
“I’m not looking for anything wonderful, with you or anybody else. I’ve had enough heartbreak to realize that relationships never work out the way you think they’re going to. Marriage and babies are not for me.”
“Then what they say is true, that you never see the same woman twice.”
Raymond’s voice turns exasperated. “I wouldn’t go that far. You got a whole weekend. I’m not looking to get tied down, not now, not ever.”
“Is that it or are you catching feelings for this one?”
“Hell no,” he responds hotly. “I’m absolutely not having a relationship with Priscilla. Don’t even go there.”
“We both know you’re nursing a huge hero complex. She’s the one you saved from her crazy husband, right?”
“I don’t think you’re supposed to be talking about your patient that way, Mariam.”