Page 11 of Rage's Solace
“God, I’m not talking about her medical issues, only what everybody already knows from watching the news.”
I cringe on the inside because my daughter has been listening to this whole conversation as well.
When Ray jumps into the truck and starts the ignition, it’s like the conversation outside never happened. He’s talking about taking us to best restaurant in town. Mia asks excitedly, “The one with Barley?”
“Yes. That’s the place. I think your mom is going to like it far more than a hamburger.”
They’re both positive and upbeat as they talk back and forth.
Me? I’m still digesting what I heard. If I thought there was a chance that Ray and I could pick up where we left off then I was mistaken. He’s not the settling down type. Not only that, but he’s got beautiful women throwing themselves at him, he doesn’t need me. And he’s nice to Mia because she’s not his.
His words reverberate through my head,Hell no … I’m absolutely not having a relationship with Priscilla. Don’t even go there.
He seemed almost insulted that she would think he could be romantically interested in the woman I’ve become. It hurt to think he was being nice to me because he felt sorry for me, but that’s the reality of my situation. The old Ray is gone, we’re like strangers now and I need to stop thinking we can reignite what we once had. I need to work on getting better so I can stop relying on his charity.
I do want to understand what happened all those years ago, though. Why did my parents tell me he was dead? I know they didn’t like him, but lying about his death was a bridge to far. Though I saw his gravestone with my own eyes, why would hehave one if he wasn’t dead? Maybe my parents honestly thought he had died?
I want to take a trip to that cemetery and visit the grave site. At the time I was too distraught to pay close attention to his headstone, I want to see if I missed some small detail that would have alerted me it was fake. I want to see if it’s actually there or if it’s something I imagined in my grief. I was a mess back then, not just about Ray, but with what happened with Ashton just before Ray died. If I had to choose a point where my life fell apart, then it would be that night. Looking into the rear-view mirror, I watch Mia all happy and content, playing on the new phone that Ray—or Rage as that nurse called him—got for her. I’m going to ask him about the name thing. I’m curious why he would have gotten tagged with such an unpleasant nickname.
As Ray’s vehicle bounces along, he reaches over to turn on some country music. As Johnny Cash’s voice came out the speakers, I smile. While so much has happened over the last eleven years, some things never changed.
***
After hearing the conversation Ray had with the nurse, part of me just wanted to go home, crawl into bed, and sleep. I was exhausted, both mentally and physically, but he seemed really excited about taking me to this place, so I shook off the blues. I’d had two weeks laying on my back to rest, so I sat back and enjoyed the ride. We were headed to the coast, and as soon as I glimpsed the ocean, I could feel my mood lift. There’s something about the calming water that always makes me happy.
He turns onto a winding road, and we end up pulling into the parking lot of a super-sweet little restaurant. It’s surrounded by trees and flowers. There’s something so quaint and old worldabout it.The Serpent’s Den, the sign over the door reads. It seems a funny name for a place like this, but I smile none the less. The moment we pull in, a small woman with long, light brown hair and a floral dress comes running out with a huge smile on her face, and she’s followed by a large sandy-colored dog. This lovely woman is so nice and well put together that I feel like a swamp creature by comparison. I haven’t been able to do my hair properly or put make-up on since the day of the shooting, the day I lost my whole life. Granted it wasn’t a life I really wanted or enjoyed but it was the one I was living. Having it all ripped away had only one saving grace, Conrad was no longer there to harass us morning, noon and night and I was no longer under the control of his family. That in and of itself was a godsend.
“Hello, I’m Meli, you must be Priscilla,” she says. Her voice is musical, and her French accent makes anything she says sound like poetry.
I reach out to shake her hand, “Nice to meet you,” I say politely.
“I am sure you would prefer to be in bed, but Rage always insists he knows best,” she says lightly, flashing a look in Ray’s direction. Or Rage, I guess if even his semi-adoptive mother calls him that, then it must be the name he uses now.
“She’s been stuck in a hospital bed for days, I thought she needed some fresh air,” he says.
“Hey, she is sitting right here and can speak for herself,” I say. I’m not really angry, but I do want to get out of the truck. It’s embarrassing to realize, but I’m going to need some help.
“Bof, Rage, help the lady now,” Meli orders.
Rage obediently opens my door and helps me out. Once I’m standing, I take a better look around, it’s like a fairytale cottage. Mia jumps out behind me with amazing agility and runs off to greet the dog she talks about constantly. She happily follows along behind us and plops down at the only open spot at a four top table once we’ve all sat down. Meli yells something in French and out comes a server with a tray full of drinks. They’re all little glass bottles with hinged tops in an oval bucket of ice. The liquid inside is all pretty pastel colors. Mia takes a clear one with bubbles. When I hesitate, Meli explains, “They’re all different kinds of fruit juice.”
Mia holds up hers. “Honeydew melon, carbonated. It’s the best one. You should try it.”
I lean over to take a bottle, the movement pulls at my stitches and I wince. Ray quickly plucks one out and hands it to me, our fingers brushing for a moment.
I don’t know why but I blush as I take it from him. I look away, hoping he doesn’t notice. I find myself face-to-face with Meli and boy does she notice everything. First a ghost of a smile jumps onto her face, then Mia says something that draws her notice and when she looks from Mia to Ray, she freezes. I catch her looking from one to the other and realize that although Ray may be oblivious, this woman is not. She sees what I saw when I saw them together for the first time. But it can’t be true. She pulls out her napkin and whispers, “Oh mon Dieu.”
“Meli, are you okay?”
She nods without looking up.
He reaches out to touch her arm. “Are you sure. You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“No ghost. Excuse me, I will be back in one moment.” My heart sinks when she jumps to her feet and darts away through a doorway markedtoilettes.
Ray looks at me and says, “There must be something going around, are you okay? You’re a little pale.”
I unhinge the lid and take a long refreshing drink of the melon spritzer trying to distract myself from Meli’s sudden disappearance. I find that it’s totally the most delicious drink I’ve ever tasted. Wonderful enough so that I want to drink it on the regular. Placing the bottle back on the table I look around, Meli is still in the restroom. I need to talk to her, I’m not sure what she’s thinking but she’s wrong. No matter how much I want it to be right.