Page 29 of Rage's Solace
“She loves it here,” I say.
“Would you like a glass of wine?” she asks, waving the bottle in the air.
“I’d love one, but as I’m driving I’d better have a coffee instead if you have a pot ready,” I respond.
“Mais oui,”Meli says as she slips out her chair and reaches for the French press.
I slide onto a stool beside my daughter as Meli pours me a cup of coffee that looks strong enough to get up and walk away and shoves a pretty platter of cheese and crackers over to me.
“I have to admit, the two of you look like you’re having fun this morning.”
Mia grins at me. “We always have fun. Last night we picked roses, chased lightning bugs, and roasted marshmallows in the fire pit. This morning Meli is going to teach me how to make strawberry conserve. That’s like fancy French jelly.”
“Sweetheart, I don’t want you near the strawberries,” I say.
“Oh do not worry,” Meli puts her hand on the back of mine, “The pan will be hot so I will make sure she only watches. Though afterwards we can eat fresh croissants with the conserve.”
“It’s not that,” I say. “She’s allergic. It’s not a deadly allergy, but if she eats them, she gets hives.”
Meli suddenly goes silent.
I look at her and she narrows her eyes, “This is very strange.”
“What is?” I ask.
“Rage, he too has an allergy.”
I’m silent for a moment, I know what she’s hinting at. I need to tell her about Ashton before she accuses me of lying to Rage again. I watch Mia who’s nibbling on cheese. “Mia, sweetheart, do you want to play on the porch with Barley while I speak to Meli for a moment? There are some nice men from Rage’s club there who can keep an eye on you.”
“Okay, Mommy,” she says and skips off happily.
Once we are alone, Meli fixes me with her clear gray eyes, “So you were lying to me?”
“I wasn’t,” I say, and suddenly the tears start to fall.
“Ohma petite, please do not cry. Here, have wine and we shall talk,” she leans over and pours a generous serving into a wine glass and nudges it towards me.
I rub my eyes on my sleeve and take a sip, “I didn’t lie, Rage isn’t Mia’s father.”
“Bof, this can’t be true. They are identical, why do you insist on denying it?” She takes a sip of her wine and pulls the bowl of strawberries towards her and picks up a paring knife.
“Because he isn’t, he can’t be, even if I wish so much that he was.”
“But you were his sweetheart, no?” she asks as she starts hulling the fruit.
“Yes, we dated throughout high school,” I say, my voice flat because I know I’m going to have to tell her about the worst time of my life.
“And you were intimate?” She stops cutting for a moment.
I nod.
Meli gives a Gallic shrug, “So, I do not see how you insist he isn’t the father.”
That’s all it takes for the tears to flow again.
“No, no, this will not do. No tears in my kitchen, tell me what happened. They say a problem shared is a problem halved,” Meli says as she hands me a piece of paper towel from the roll on the table.
“It’s more than a problem,” I say, my voice is shaky. Other than my parents who tried to cover everything up, I’ve never tolda single person what happened to me that night. Looking back, maybe if I had told Conrad then we might have been closer, that’s if he knew what his brother did. Or maybe it was only his father who was in on it. Or maybe his father, like Conrad, thought Mia was Rage’s. “We were so in love, I was going to college in the fall and Ray was staying in Las Salinas, I truly believed we would be together forever and we’d survive being apart. A week before I was due to leave, I was heading home from a friend’s house when I was attacked,” I pause and look at Meli.