Page 41 of Rage's Solace
“I’m sure he’d like that.” Tugging the container gently from my hand, she tells me, “I’ll call you the minute I get the results back.”
As I head back to my bike I check the first item of the day off my list. Next, I want to meet with Rigs. I send him a text and discover he’s in his office at the clubhouse. I go straight there and stalk into his office without so much as a good morning to anyone.
He can tell by the look on my face that something’s up. “Sit down, take a few deep breaths and tell me what’s bothering you, brother.”
I sit in the chair on the other side of his desk and just blurt it all out to him. “You already know I’m back with Priscilla.”
“If you’re here about the rabbit thing, we got a match on the fingerprints on the box, but the perp was picked up by the police on a drug charge before we could get to him. He’s in county lockup. We plan to jump on him the minute he gets released.”
Making an imperious slashing gesture with one hand, I say, “Good information to have, but I’m not here about that. I was taking care of Mia today and caught a glimpse of both of us in the mirror. It hit me pretty hard how much we look alike. We both have green eyes, the same complexion, and exactly the same type of hair.”
Rigs begins to pull back. “What exactly are you saying?”
“I asked her how old she is, and she said she was ten. Going by her birthday, and assuming Priscilla had a nine-month pregnancy, that means she was pregnant when she took off. To my mind that means there’s a good probability that Mia is my daughter.”
Rigs’ expression is cautious. “That’s good news, right?”
“Yeah, I’d love it if Mia turns out to be my kid. What I don’t appreciate is her mother running out on me pregnant, pretending she thought I was dead and marrying an asshole like Conrad. He had no business being within striking distance of my daughter. I cannot forgive her for not telling me right away when we first got back together. I mean, why wouldn’t she tell me?”
“Why do you think she didn’t tell you, Rage?”
I shrug, still angry. “I don’t know. She sent me a letter years ago saying that we were from different worlds, and she wanted someone who could provide the kind of life her parents did when she was growing up. Then she told me the letter was fabricated by her parents and given to me behind her back.”
“So you don’t believe her. Is that what I’m hearing you say?”
“When she came back into my world, she convinced me that everything I thought I knew about our breakup was wrong. She got me to trust her again. We’ve gotten really close over the last few weeks. I fell in love with her all over again and we’ve been sleeping together. And then she never fucking told me that Mia was my daughter.”
“I know that hurts and she should have been honest with you, but we need to look at the reasons she might not have felt comfortable doing that—that’s if Mia is yours and we still don’t know if that’s true.”
“You’re right. I know you are. But it feels like I’m good enough to save her life, take her in when she has nowhere to go, provide for her and protect her but somehow, I’m not good enough to be Mia’s dad. That’s really fucking unfair because I’ve gone the extra mile for this woman.”
“I’m not trying to play devil’s advocate here, but I don’t think you should get yourself worked up until you get a court ordered paternity test.”
“Fuck that, I dropped off hair samples from me and Mia at the lab in town just now. I know it won’t hold up in court, but it’ll be enough for me, I need to know this. I can always get a court appointed one if and when I file for custody and make no mistake I will file on her.”
Rigs gives me a hard stare, “You sound really angry right now, like a guy who’s earned his club name a hundred times over. I’ll do everything in my power to help you get to the bottom of this but my best advice for you is to stay away from Priscilla and Mia until you calm down. Going in half-cocked won’t do anyone any favors.”
“Fuck being calm! Do you understand what this means? It means the only woman I ever loved is just using me. How do I know she didn’t make up a bunch of lies to excuse away our breakup because she needs me right now.”
“I know you don’t want to hear it, but this is your anger talking. She didn’t engineer the situation with her husband shooting her, she didn’t know that you’d be called in as the medic. We don’t know what she’s been through, if she’s been hiding things from you, then she might have a good reason,” the older brother’s voice is calm but deadly serious. I know somewhere deep inside that he’s talking sense, but right now I don’t give a damn, “But why—”
“First things first, brother. You’ve got the ball rolling on the paternity test which will answer your main question. What’s next?”
“Ven has agreed to go to the courthouse with me. I want to pull her marriage license and Mia’s birth certificate. I want to see with my own eyes what she wrote down on those dates. I have the breakup letter from years ago and I want to see if the handwriting matches up, if she wrote the letter or someone else did.”
Before Rigs can interject, I continue. “Then I want to visit Meli. She and Priscilla have been getting close and I want to know if she’s told her anything. I know what Meli is like, if she suspected anything she’d have come right out and asked. If Priscilla has lied to her, I’m not gonna be okay with that. Meli has been nothing but nice to us. She doesn’t deserve to be lied to because Priscilla is ashamed of who Mia’s father is.”
“Why would she be ashamed of you, Rage? You’re a fine, upstanding member of our community and member of the Savage Legion MC.”
I jump to my feet and start pacing. “Because I grew up being kicked from one placement to another because of my shitty, uncooperative behavior. Because I never went to college. Because I’m a member of an MC. Because I still fly off the handle sometimes when I’m super stressed. There is a pile of reasons why a woman wouldn’t want me to be her baby daddy, but I don’t care. If Mia is my child, God help anyone who stands in my way of getting my fair share of parent time with her. Even if she isn’t mine, I was getting used to her being in my life. I could see myself as her father.”
“Sit down,” Rigs commands. I do as he says. “You’ve got it into your head that she’s yours and that Priscilla is lying. You’ve just admitted that you’d still want to be a father figure to her even if she wasn’t yours. This is exactly why you cannot go offlike a damn wrecking ball ruining what you’ve built up with Priscilla over the past few weeks. Do you understand? Before any accusations are made, you need to back them up with facts. I’d go as far as to say you don’t even present them as accusations. Have a talk like fucking adults.”
Rigs rarely swears, but it does the job, and I find myself nodding in agreement.
“Do you have this letter on you?” he asks.
I whip it out of my back pocket and drop it on the desk in front of him “I spent years thinking this is why she left me and now, I don’t know what to think.”