Page 47 of Daring Destiny
I tug her against me. She always says things like this, like she doesn’t know how special she is. It kills me every time. We’re quite the pair. As opposite as we are, we share one thing in common. A lack of self-awareness of our worth. Together, I think we’re healing.
“You’re so much more,” I murmur into her hair. “You know that, right?”
She nods against my chest, but I can feel the uncertainty in the way she holds on to me. I pull her closer to hopefully reassure her. Astrid has no idea how much she’s given me by extending her stay. She’s brought a steadiness into my life. Fun. Spontaneity. And, calmness.
No, balance.
We both know when she goes back to Seattle, everything could change. Without our day-to-day routine, I’ll likely slip back into CognifyAI tunnel vision.
God, I want to tell her about my diagnosis. Why I struggle with mundane things that seem second nature to her. I swear, I’ve nearly confessed so many times over the past few weeks.
Except, every time I open my mouth, I stop myself. Even though I know she loves me as I am, part of me worries her perception will change. She’ll realize I’m more of a project than a partner.
I couldn’t bear it. Not from her.
So I say nothing. Not yet. Instead, I press a kiss to her forehead. Hope I’ll find the perfect time to unload my truth someday.
“I wish you didn’t have to go,” I whisper.
“I know,” she sighs. “But, I do…”
“I get it,” I cut in, trying to keep the exasperation out of my voice. “We can’t lose what we have.”
She pulls back and looks into my eyes. “We’ll figure it out. I promise.”
I want to believe her. But I know how it goes. I know it’s a grind to make long-distance relationships work. I’ve watched my rockstar brothers struggle with it. And their bandmates. Now, we’re staring down the same path, knowing no matter how much we want to be together, it’s not going to be easy.
“Tomorrow, I’m getting my shit together.” I decide to shift the conversation in a positive direction. “I’ll call the financial manager and dig out the name of my lawyer. When I started CognifyAI, Connor had Jace’s dad—your buddy, Jason Deveraux—recommend someone at Finney Cooper. I’ll get in touch with him because it’s time to get serious. I’ve let the board push me around. Trusted what they tell me I’m obligated to do.”
“Good. You deserve to take control of this, Brennan. It’syourcompany.” Astrid’s eyes light up with approval.
“Yeah.” I nod. “It is.”
Maybe if I try hard enough, I’ll be worthy of her. Show her that having a bit of neurodivergence doesn’t define me.
Because I’m not letting go of Astrid.
Never.
She’s inspiration enough to make me want to do better.
nineteen
Astrid
One Month Later
BrennanreturnedtoSeattletoday.
Not under the best of circumstances, unfortunately.
I sit by the window, gazing out at the dark water. Waiting. The gentle movement of the lake usually soothes me. Tonight, not so much. My nerves are utterly on edge.
He was supposed to get here hours ago and, aside from a quick phone call on his way to his parents’ house from the airport, I haven’t heard a thing.
It’s stressful because I know what he’s going through. The waiting is hard. I’m worried about him. Worried about the situation. I wish he’d send even a short text though…
Is it wrong to feel this way? Probably. Couples are supposed to be in regular communication about important life events. Yeah, I know this isn’t about me. He needs to be with his family, and I get it…