Page 46 of Caught Running
Jake pressed his lips together to restrain the smile and nodded. “I had a hard night, too,” he countered, resting one ankle on his knee and holding his foot to keep his knee from bouncing.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Brandon said, deliberately playing it up, although he’d really rather stop talking so vaguely. He sighed. “I need to go shower. I’ve got about thirty minutes until class,” he said regretfully.
Jake looked down briefly before glancing back up at Brandon. He was no longer smiling, and his eyes had gone black and glinting. “You giving me a ride home today?” he asked in a low voice, mindful of anyone close to them.
Rather than waffling like yesterday, Brandon knew exactly what he wanted. The shine in Jake’s eyes was almost a promise. “Yes.”
“Good,” Jake murmured, lips curving crookedly in a pleased, slightly evil smile. “I look forward to it.”
Brandon knew he would think of that smile the rest of the day. “Good,” he said playfully, walking backwards away from the fence before turning to jog back to the gym and the shower.
Jake was careful not to turn and watch him go. Instead he turned his attention back to the kids and silently wondered how he would get through the rest of the day.
Confirming his thought, Brandon did indeed think of Jake’s smile through classes, lunch and practice. He packed up equipment along with Jonathan, thinking about that smile. He waited as Jake finished up, leaning on the fence as usual, contemplating how caught up he was in the other man. He felt like he wanted to change his whole life around just to keep Jake in it. Brandon was pretty sure it wasn’t transitory on his part. He wouldn’t tire of being around Jake’s frenetic energy and schizophrenic behavior. No, he was more concerned about Jake deciding he’d had enough of the admittedly geeky and focused science teacher who was taking a flying leap by trying to at least act like a coach.
Jake took one last look around the empty field before strolling over to the fence where the other coaches were all waiting for him.
“Whatcha think, Coach? You ran them hard enough. Have they got that defeated mindset out of their heads?” Troy asked seriously.
“No,” Jake answered, kicking the fence in frustration. “They will, though,” he added determinedly watching the last tired kid straggle out of sight. “Let’s go home,” he huffed. “I’m tired.”
Jonathan and the college guys said goodbye and wandered off, and Troy zipped off in his golf cart, leaving Jake and Brandon walking across the parking lot toward the Jetta. It was a quiet drive to Jake’s, even more so when Brandon pulled into the driveway.
Jake cocked his head to the side and looked up at his house. “So what am I doing wrong?” he asked out of the blue. “What am I doing different this year that’s fucking them up?”
Brandon glanced at Jake, a little surprised. “I’m not sure I can even come close to answering that, Jake. But I can tell you what I think,” he offered.
“Okay,” Jake responded with a nod, still looking up at his house.
“I think they’re nervous. They want to please you. They’re so tied up in knots about it that their focus is shot.”
Jake flinched and glanced over at Brandon. “That’s never been a problem before,” he argued weakly.
“They’ve never been this close before,” Brandon said in a quiet voice. “They want it, and more so, they know you want it. It’s not a bad thing, Jake. They’re just, well, they’re trying too damn hard. They need to relax and enjoy it.”
Jake was silent again, thinking. He would have to turn more of his concentration to this than he had been. He hadn’t even realized he had begun to slack until it was too late.
“Jake. You have got to relax. Every time you tense up, they tense up. The tighter you get, the tighter they get. Hell, the more you stress, the more they stress!” Brandon shook his head, seeing the dark look on Jake’s face. “Am I getting through at all here?”
“Yes,” Jake answered tightly.
Closing his eyes as Jake’s tense voice cut through him, Brandon tried to shrug it off as much as possible. “Okay,” he whispered, just sitting there. He didn’t know what else to say or do.
“Thanks,” Jake whispered, feeling guilty. He swallowed and nodded at the house with a small smile. “Care to come in?” he asked wryly.
Brandon’s eyes blinked open, and he relaxed a little as he looked over at Jake. “Yeah,” he agreed.
Jake had been watching him and he sighed. “I make you nervous, too, don’t I?”
“Sometimes,” Brandon admitted evenly, but he added a playful grin after. “It’s usually in a good way, though.”
“Is it?” Jake asked.
The moment tensed, and it felt like a turning point—like Brandon’s decision now would turn him right or left. One road steered him on his way alone. The other... He nodded, meeting Jake’s eyes, purposefully letting the emotions he usually quashed shine in his eyes. This was his chance. “Yes.”
Jake felt an unusual flutter in his chest, and he frowned at Brandon in continued silence. Then he leaned over the console between them and pulled Brandon closer to kiss him impulsively.
It was like the first time, that nervous kiss on the couch. Brandon’s surprise held him aloof for a few moments before he relaxed into Jake’s arms and returned his kiss whole-heartedly. Maybe Jake had glimpsed what Brandon felt.