Page 28 of Fractured Mind

“We know you too well,” Roman says, pursing his lips. “Running yourself into the ground when something is bothering you.”

They don’t understand how much Ineedthis. Fighting is my outlet—it’s all I’ve known since Mia and my dad left. It’s the onlything that tames the anger and pain that force themselves to the surface. After the fights, emptiness envelops me... numbness takes over... finally, exhaustion brings peace. I glance at my hands, which are burning and red. What am I supposed to do when Mia begs me to stop fighting again? I could never see myself quitting the one thing that’s kept me sane, but seeing her upset over it... now I’m not quite sure.

“You need to get your head into the game,” Jackson warns. “You can’t keep getting distracted—you’ll end up in the hospital.”

I grind my teeth. “What am I supposed to do?” I’m revved up on adrenaline, but no matter how many punches I throw, I can’t shake off the unsettling feeling that lingers within me. Seeing Mia, talking to her... holding her. It was euphoric. I forgot how good being with her made me feel. “Mia’s mom didn’t even tell her about me... about her past... about the accident. I’m just a stranger to her.” That knife is dug deep. How could her mother do that to her? Mia’s mom needs more than rehab as far as I’m concerned.

“I get it, but you two already act like you’ve known each other for a while,” Levi adds.

“I agree,” says Roman. “Even though she lost her memory, it seems there’s still a familiarity between you two.”

“Ashton, you’re up,” a voice calls out. I look at the door to see Cash, a War Brothers MC member, waving me over.

I flash him a dark grin.Finally . . .

Levi chuckles. “I pity the guy who has to go up against Ashton tonight.”

There will be no mercy.

After the match,I head home instead of celebrating my victory. I take a shower and then collapse onto my bed, wincing at the pounding in my head. My cheek is tender to the touch, but I’ve felt worse. I let my opponent land a punch—just once—to fuel my adrenaline, and then I lost control and won by a wide margin. I needed this win desperately, but it hasn’t calmed my mind as much as I’d hoped.

My phone glows on the bed next to me. I pick it up and see a message from Ruby.

Congrats on your win. I thought you’d want to pick up Mia tomorrow to go on the boat.

Thanks, I’ll pick her up.

I close the message and then wonder whether I should send Mia a message. How I left her wasn’t ideal, so I decide to do it.

Hey, it’s Ashton. How’s your night been?

Omg! Ashton, are you okay?

I smile at the fact she cares.

I’m fine. You had nothing to worry about. I won too, by the way.

Hmm... I don’t care much about if you won. As long as you’re okay.

Relief surges within me. There’s pressure on me to win my fights, but it’s nice to know she doesn’t care either way.

How’s the running going?

I haven’t been running since Ruby told me what happened.

I overreacted about you running. I guess it opened up old wounds.

Fucking understatement, that’s for sure.

It’s okay, I understand.

The idea of her running makes my stomach churn. I need to find a way to support her in getting back into running but also to make sure I’m there alongside her to keep her safe. I change the subject and ask her a question I’ve been dying to ask since I first saw her.

Do you have a boyfriend?

No.

Perfect.