Page 88 of Shattered Hearts
“Thank you again?—”
“So what’s the deal with you and Finn?” Cian maneuvers the steering wheel with one hand. “Are you in love with him?”
I nearly spew the mocha latte all over the dashboard. “I’m…sorry?”
“I saw the way you guys acted at the reception.” Cian engages his right turn signal. “And something tells me neither one of you was acting.”
With his words, Cian steamrolls my already-hurting heart completely flat.
As he dips into the loading zone, I choose to bypass his astute observation. “I finish at three today?—”
“Okay, ignore me. That’s fine.” Cian fixes me with a threatening glare. “But don’t toy with his heart. He’s been through a lot of fucked up shit.”
Me?Toy withhim? The idea’s so ridiculous, I actually laugh. For a moment, I just stare at Cian. It’s obvious he doesn’t trust me. Like any good friend, he’s worried about Finn. Part of me wants to confide in him, to bring him into my confidence.
He’s the only one who knows something about what I’m going through. He knows I’m impersonating Harper. And since I’m pretty sure he’s got some sort of secret obsession with her, there’s no way he’s upset that she left Finn at the altar.
But his flat, calculating gaze reminds me of the truth. How can I forget that, to most of the Gallaghers, I’m nothing but a traitor with a penchant for backstabbing?
I botched what could’ve been the family’s most lucrative opportunity to expand operations across state lines in the past decade. I’m sure my father and Shane decried and degradedme, high and low. And here I am, impersonating my sister and participating in a fake marriage with one of Cian’s closest friends. Of course he doesn’t like or trust me.
I don’t like or trust me either.
“You don’t have to worry.” I meet his gaze head-on. “If anyone is going to get their heart broken around here, it’ll be me.”
I leave it at that. Inside the shelter, I try to get through my workday. Half of me is able to keep it together while working on autopilot. The other half is an utter wreck.
Every time I see a door, I feel my back pressed against one and remember the way Finn fucked me standing up in his bathroom, questioning me while he crammed his cock in. I get so hot and dizzy from shame and residual lust, I have to go to the restroom to recompose myself.
I feel so used, I wish I could tear my soul out of my body and start over in a fresh one. Wouldn’t that be amazing? If I could just be reborn somewhere else, in a family I actually belong in, in a place far away from here, where there are no guns or clubs or crime or men like Finn to frustrate and possess me…
Working at the shelter often entails a lot of moving around—filing things, checking in with people, setting up for events—which is fine most days. But today, when I have sex marathon related soreness, staying active has become a constant reminder of yesterday’s events.
By the time I plop into one of the armchairs in the break room, sometime in the afternoon, I’m exhausted. Even sitting reminds me of Finn. Because I can still feel his lips, tongue, and beard tantalizing my ass…how he made me come on his face again before railing me against his desk until he shot hisnthcumload deep inside me. Yesterday, he claimed my body, inside and out.
Tears prick at the back of my eyes when I wonder whether my body will ever feelmineagain…
“Is the AC acting up again?” Jane sits in the chair across from mine, glancing up at the wheezing HVAC unit. “You’re all flushed.”
“I think it might be.” I make a fanning motion. “I’m a little warm.”
We have the space to ourselves for the moment.
For the thousandth time, I contemplate telling Jane everything, but Michelle dips into the room before I vomit my whole life story out into the silence between us. I know that’s for the best.
“What are you two still doing here?” Michelle grabs her raincoat off a hook in the corner. “Your shift ended half an hour ago.”
“What?” I check my watch, and sure enough, it’s half past four.
How has the whole day flown by already? I’m late meeting Cian, and I don’t have his number.
Shit, shit, shit.I spring to my feet.
Jane peers up at me. “Riley?”
“I forgot I’m meeting a friend today.” I gather my things and make a beeline for the shelter exit.
Out in the afternoon sunlight, I scan the street for an idling sports car. Once I find Cian’s Audi parked near the corner, I hurry over. I’ve tried to keep Cian’s words from this morning off my mind today, but as I approach his car, they glare at me now.