Page 90 of Dare To Love Me

Warmth bloomed in my chest. Luca didn’t have to go the extra mile to cook for me or spoil me. I’d already slept with him, so it wasn’t like he was trying to score brownie points to get into my panties. Luca was doing it simply because he wanted too. The gesture caused my heart to peak out from the curtain it was trying to hide behind.

Instead of a general store, Luca took me to Coplay Place, not only to buy solan brand products for me, but also replace the items I had lost the day Arianna and I were attacked. Evidently, people’s depravity knew no bounds, due to the fact all the bags we dropped were stollen right out of the crime scene.

“How is it that no cops have come around asking questions?”

Luca’s face turned to granite, halting us in our tracks. “It’s nothing you need to be concerned about Becka.”

My head bobbed in reply. I didn’t like it, but it wasn’t like I had a choice. This is what I signed up for. To be submerged under the surface only hearing the muffled sounds of what would be going on around me. Of what my husband would be doing above the water.

As we continued through the mall memories started to track me. Dark ones, with guns firing and men chasing. Tension built in my shoulders, my gaze jumped around imagining faces that weren’t really there.

Suddenly, a big warm hand laced its fingers through my own and gave a reassuring squeeze. My heart fluttered. Luca looked straight ahead pretending like nothing was happening. But I could feel the uncertainty in his stiff arm.

Has he ever held someone’s hand before?

The smile splitting my face in half hurt my cheeks. The ambiance of it all rode a thin line of normalcy. Like we were no different from the dozens of other couples around us. Of course, we were far from normal, but even if it was just for one day—I allowed myself to dream.

After the mall and the supermarket we went home, spending the early evening cooking Chicken Parmesan together. Making light conversation as best we could. Both still dancing around each other to avoid sensitive subjects. Continuing to feel each other out.

Luca, I found out, never watched TV— unless it was to watch UFC.

He told me about his kickboxing days, when he could have gone pro. It was sad to hear he never took the chance because the Russos already held his loyalty.

Dinner turned out delicious despite arguing over how to best bread the chicken. It ended with Luca pinning me to the counter and kissing me until my brains were leaking out my ears and I gave up. Then I snuck in extra seasoning when his back was turned.

We sat down to eat with me feeling more relaxed than I had in days. It had been a good day. One I so desperately needed.

It was easy to savor the Chicken Parmesan and salad while rejoicing in my first peaceful day in a week. Well, if you exclude getting a pelvic exam by a stranger. Before today, my sanity had been hanging on by a thread.

“I have to go to the club tonight.” His words had my head springing up to peer at him across the table, my heart sank. I didn’t want to be alone. There was apology in his eyes. The news didn’t seem to make him any happier that it made me.

“Will you have to go every night? I know today was a rarity with you not having to work.” Arianna constantly complained how Matteo rarely took time away from work. Luca was no exception. You could practically smell the workaholic sent floating around him.

A hand ran through his hair then leaned his elbows on the table, giving me his full attention. “I’m usually very busy. I help Matteo run many aspects of the businesses. Everyone’s gotten use to me working around the clock because I’ve never had anything diverting my attention. So, not every night, but I can’t make you any promises.”

“Ok.” Reality hit home hard. My fork absently pushed the food around on my plate. Now the day seemed like a tease. I rolled my lips together to keep from openly frowning.

“Hey.” Luca’s smooth voice had me looking up into soft brown eyes “Things are going to be rough for the next few weeks because of a big meeting we have coming up. Also, with Matteo gone for a few days with Arianna I’m going to be pulling double duty. But I will do my best to make as much time for you as I can.”

A deep breath puffed from my lips. “I can handle that, but I can’t sit around here all day. Even with the gym. I can’t be stuck here,” I deadpanned. “I’ll go out of my mind.”

“I will assign you a regular driver who will also be your guard.” He threw up a hand when I opened my mouth to argue. “It’s not that I don’t trust you. But the Russians are not going to lay down after what we did to retaliate.” Something shifted in Luca’s demeanor. All the softness turned to rock. His eyes churned with anger, dark energy floated from his aura. “I’m not taking any chances.”

What we did to retaliate. My brain stumbled back on Luca’s words. “Wait? What did you do to the Russians?”

Luca’s face turned dark. Demons danced in his eyes around fire. A muscle along his jaw ticked. I didn’t feel the fury was directed at me, but it had me frozen in place all the same. The day had made it easy to forget that first and foremost, Luca was a very dangerous man.

“We did what was necessary.” His tone cut through me with the iron, cold blade of an axe. “I will not be telling you about any aspects of what I do. I need you to understand that.”

I nodded in acknowledgement, my voice still lodged in my throat. Even if I wanted to challenge him, it was not a fight I could win. And maybe I didn’t want to.

Whatever happened was bad on a level I wasn’t sure I was capable of compartmentalizing. In that moment I decided I didn’t want to know what happened. Not wanting to destroy the seed we just planted. But was plausible deniability any better?

What kind of person does that make me? To willingly look away with the excuse of not knowing.

He broke eye contact first, glancing at his watch. “I have to change and get going.” He stood from the table, walked over and pressed a kiss to my lips but it wasn’t warm or inviting. His mood had soured. “I’ll see you in the morning hopefully. A guard is here, but my number is in your phone if you need anything.” In his usual manner, he left it at that and was out the door before I could reply.

“I hate it when he does that,” I grumbled, shoving an angry bite of chicken into my mouth.