Page 78 of Finding Fate
“It was for yours! Had it been for mine you would have been honest with me. You told me it was birth control! Do you realize how many horrible things could have happened? I will never trust you again.”
“You knew I didn’t believe in birth control. Your mother was never on it, and just because she had a bastard child doesn’t mean I changed my values. I can’t help that you don’t listen.”
“I had just had a baby out of wedlock! As a teenager! Excuse me for thinking you wanted to prevent it from happening again. What if I had trusted the wrong person?!”
“You’re a Thanos. You hardly trust anyone. You like your control too much.”
While that may be true . . .“Because I’m just like you?”
He snaps his jaw shut and rears his head back like I slapped him. “Loving someone doesn’t justify giving them everything, Gabrielle. Wake up and look around. You want me to tell you things? Isn’t that what you’ve always said? To be honest with you? Well, I’ll tell you that I fell in love with your mother before we were arranged to be married. I conned your grandfather into choosing her. Did my research. She had the background that would appeal to him. It took months of manipulating him to look at her. And you know where that got me? Marrying for love? She made a fool of me. She gave another man something that was mine. When I confronted her about the affair, she cried and begged for me not to leave her. I chose to forgive her. Then she fell pregnant. I gave her two options. She could get rid of it and we start over, or she could leave, but either way, she wasn’t taking you with her. She stepped out of our covenant, not me. I wasn’t raising another man’s kid. You know what she chose? She left. Just like that boy inside.”
“You forced him! Don’t you dare compare him to Mom. He didn’t do anything wrong.”
He pushes off the pavement and comes toward me, his shoulders square with mine. “I don’t want the same thing to happen to you. You were in too deep! That boy was nothing more than an undertow, quickly pulling you under. You had the same look in your eyes I did when she begged me to stay with her. I was protecting you! Did you really think you’d marry the boy you met at thirteen had the two of you stayed together? Use your head, Gabrielle. He was going to hurt you the second he graduated.”
“He was different.”
“They’re all the same. They want to sow their wild oats while they’re young. That involves girls in number. Boys will tell you anything to get what you were giving. I put it on me, so you didn’t have to experience that kind of pain.”
I start to cry. My mind is overwhelmed. “That wasn’t for you to decide! Even if he had, it’s called growing pains, Dad. And maybe in your mind you really believe you were protecting me, but that doesn’t explain you taking my son from me. I kept it from Maddox hoping you’d see how bad I wanted him and let me keep him. He was your grandson and you gave him away like he was a puppy. We could have raised him together. I know you wanted a son to carry on the family name. I’m not stupid.” My voice cracks and tears fall. Dad and I haven’t discussed Madden since I went back to school after he was born.
“A son would have been fine had your mother been faithful. I don’t want one if it meant replacing you.” His eyes bore into mine like a killer. One look from him can instill fear into the most dangerous. “I gave that boy the length of your pregnancy to come for you. To stand up to me for you. To show me you were worth the risk and consequence. Foryou, not some circumstance like an illegitimate child. I’d calmed down by the time you found out you were pregnant.”
I blink at him, my throat so thick I can’t swallow. “What?”
“Had Maddox shown back up for you at any given point during your pregnancy like a man, despite the fact that I could press charges on him, I would have let you keep him. You think I was going to give him a jumpstart with a reason? You were the reason! He never came back. You were fifteen, goddammit! You weren’t going to make all the sacrifices while he partied and lived it up. You’remypriority. If it makes me the bad guy to make sure you have a future, then so be it. Just because you don’t know all the gory details of the adoption doesn’t mean I didn’t do my part when it comes to my blood. Any man that deserves you will do anything to get you. And everything I did to get you out of that mess was for nothing, because here you are pregnant again.”
My mouth opens and I stare at him, tears streaming down my face. “How did you know?”
“Because he couldn’t wait to rub it in my face, Gabrielle, but I guess that means it’s true.” He steps forward and roughly grips my chin in his hand, forcing me to look at him. “You’re only twenty-one. Why can’t you just let yourself be a damn kid, huh? You have all the time in the world to have kids. Did you learn nothing with experience?”
My cries pick up. “I could blame this on you, considering I thought I was on birth control, but I won’t. I’ll take responsibility for my actions. Disappointing to know I’m not your perfect little girl anymore, isn’t it? I make one mistake after another. I’m surprised you remembered I gained another year in age.”
He tightens his grip on me, making me whimper. “I’ve never forgotten your birthday, even when you were running from me, just like I’ve never forgotten my grandson’s birthday. You’re my only daughter. Your mother and I were at an elite Halloween party the night she went into labor. Regardless of what you think, I’ve always wanted what was best for you. I love you, but before I give you away, I’m going to make sure he’s right for you.”
I sob. This is more emotion than I’ve gotten out of my dad in years. But as I look at his handsome face, bruised and swollen, I’m reminded that he and Maddox aren’t on good terms. My dad is my past, while Maddox is my future. I have to put him first. “Then give me space.”
He sighs, clearly not liking my request. “Your grandfather isn’t going to like this.”
“I love him, Daddy. You can’t play roulette with a person. We were both just kids livin’ on love and high on life. Someone shouldn’t have to prove himself to be worthy. He would have never left had you never given him the ultimatum.”
His eyes soften. “The chip was for your benefit. I knew you wouldn’t cooperate had I told you what it was. Yes, you are just like me in ways. I’ve never denied it. After so much went on under my nose, some of it was for me, but most of it was for you. You’re my only child. I can’t live in a world where I don’t know where you are, that you’re safe.” He reaches in his pocket after releasing me, and then opens my hand, placing a set of keys in it. “Space is what I’ve been giving you since the night I came home and you were gone. Don’t think for a second I didn’t know where you were. Happy late birthday, baby. I know you don’t need my money as much as I wish you did, but a parent will always make sure their children are taken care of.”
He kisses my temple and then pulls away. I stare down at the key fob with the Acura logo on it, and then I look up at him, confused. “You brought my car here?”
He shakes his head. “I sold it. I realized you were never going to drive that car again. There were too many bad memories tied to it. I bought this one when I got here. I never came for a fight. I came for you. I hate you being gone. I miss my daughter. I may have to share you, but no man is going to take you from me.”
I look past him and notice the brand-new black Acura TLX with dark rims in the driveway. It’s beautiful. “Daddy,” I whisper. “I can’t take this. I won’t be bribed. I’m not giving this baby up.”
“Gabby,” he says for I think the first time in my life. “I’d be concerned if you wanted to. I’m going to give you what you asked for. I’m going to go home, let things calm down, and then we’re going to figure this out. I can’t live my life pretending you don’t exist.”
“You’re going to have to come to him, Dad. After everything, Maddox isn’t going to try for a relationship with you, and we’re a package deal.” He stares at me, and then pulls me in for a hug. I squeeze him back, scared to let go. It’s been a long damn time since I hugged my dad, and as I hold onto his shirt, I lose it. “I’ve missed you.”
“When you love someone, you’ll go to any length to make sure they’re taken care of. Sometimes the extremes aren’t necessarily what’s best. You don’t see it at the time, but I never left you.”
He pulls away and turns to walk down the driveway as a car pulls in. “Who’s that?”
“My ride to the airport. Be expecting my call.”