Page 102 of Into the Dark
I nod, crossing to where my small black velvet clutch rests on the side table. A last-minute buy from a cluttered vintage accessory shop near Covent Garden, I bought and paid for it myself. I check inside to make sure I’ve moved over the essentials from my other bag: lip balm—a small, round tin that hasn’t looked the same for a few days and likely never will again—mascara, liner, and a lip/cheek tint I load up on every year from the airport pharmacy in Nice. The small bag has a silver chain as its strap, which I tuck inside before folding the front over to close it.
Behind me, I hear Jake talking in semi-quiet tones in the kitchen.
What a long, eventful, surprising day. Caleb and then Susan. Did both those things really happen in one sunny afternoon? It seems surreal now to think of it. For all Jake has revealed to me for the rest of the afternoon, he really has forgotten she ever came.
I turn to look at him then. Such a hardy, impenetrable shell. A shell that often shifts and cracks, emanating warmth and light for me, but one he’ll ultimately force back into place whenever he wants to. He’s spent his life doing that. It’s simply who he is. How he deals with things. I’ll need to work a lot harder to shift it permanently. Do I even want that?
He hangs up the phone and drains his beer, depositing the bottle in the black recycling bin on the inside of the cupboard below the sink. “Think of anywhere you want to go?” he asks, coming toward me. “He’ll be here in ten.”
“You know, it’s Saturday night in London—we probably should have reserved somewhere…” I lift his arm up to look at his watch. 7:20 p.m. Late for a couple with no dinner reservations.
He shrugs, looking unconcerned. “We’ll be fine. Plenty of places that know Fred.” He stops, considering this. “Actually, I’d rather keep him out of this. Rather he didn’t know where the fuck I am, you know.”
I nod in understanding. Fred keeps tabs on him then. Interesting.
He seems to remember something. “He’s out of town this weekend, though, so it should be cool.”
“Somewhere nice?” Why on earth do I care?
Jake rolls his eyes. “Taking his twenty-three-year-old girlfriend on a spa break.”
“Are you jealous of Fred’s twenty-three-year-old?” I smile.
He wraps his arms around me and raises an eyebrow. “Think I couldn’t have a twenty-three-year-old if I wanted?”
I reach up to fiddle with his collar. “Oh, I think you could probably have any girl in London if you wanted them, Jake.”
“It’s the massive cock—works every time,” he says with a wink. I pretend to look insulted. “Doesn’t matter because there’s only one girl I want.” He kisses me hard on the mouth, stealing the words I was about to say. He strokes his tongue against mine. “I don’t think I’ll ever stop wanting you,” he says, dragging his mouth down my throat, scorching my skin as it goes. He smells and tastes divine. That particular clean, sweet spiciness that makes my mouth water. “So, where do you want to go? Fuck Fred.”
“Oh, I know!” I announce suddenly.
“What?”
“Wait,” I tell him.
He stares after me blankly as I go to retrieve my phone from my bag. It’s worth a try.
The phone rings out for a bit before he picks up. Nick sounds breathless, and I think maybe I’ve called him at practically the worst moment possible. I try to listen for the sound of Jin in the background, my apology ready on my tongue.
“Al, what’s up?” Nick says.
“Umm, nothing. Can you talk?”
“Yeah, I’m just at the gym—why? You okay?”
“Are you? You’re at the gym on a Saturday night?”
“What? Jin’s at work. Anyway, it’s the best time to go. The place is empty.”
“Mm-hmm. I’m sure it is.”
He sighs. “What’s up anyway?”
“I was looking for a favor, actually. I want to take Jake for dinner tonight, somewhere nice.” I smile over at him. He has one eyebrow raised in curiosity, mouth soft. “But I’ve left it too late to book somewhere decent. Can you do your thing, best big brother in the world?” My voice drips with saccharine sweetness.
“Where is it you want?”
“Oh, I’m not too fussed. Just somewhere nice. We’re pretty dressed up,” I add.