Page 139 of Lost in the Dark

Josiah came around holding a warm mug of coffee out to me, which I gratefully took. “If you’re running from something, Lizzy—let Reeve go do what Reeve does. He’ll handle it for you.”

I wanted to ask,how?And I wanted to disbelieve. But with the both of them looking at me all kind-and-shit, I was just this side of crying, unshed tears welling up inside my eyes.

“He’s right,” Reeve said, deciding for me. “I’ll be back. Stay with Jo; he’ll show you a good time.”

“I don’t know about that,” Jo said. “But at least there’s bacon.”

I wiped my face again and sniffled. “Bacon can solve a lot of problems.”

Jo nodded and gently took my elbow, pulling me back to camp.

Sitting in a camping chair and watching Jo tend to camp things was somehow comforting. He seemed so capable, so resourceful, it was easy to imagine him taking care of me, too.

Because that’s what I guessed I wanted, after being diagnosed. I knew no one could come up and promise me that I was going to get better, especially not after getting medical opinions two-through-four.

But I just hadn’t wanted to feel like I was going into what remained of my life alone.

I wanted someone to treat me nice. To hold me. To whisper “Poor baby,” and maybe rock me back and forth.

Eric would’ve never been that person for me. I’d have to hug myself. I snorted, and did so, wrapping my arms beneath my breasts.

At least the glade we were in currently was peaceful. The grass was a bright, ankle-length green that had a spring to it with every step. The boys had set up inside a circle of tall, old trees, which meant that even though it was sunny out, everything was cast in dappling shadow.

Jo came over to refill my mug, holding a plate of eggs and bacon. I took it, and he sat in the camping chair beside me. “So how’d you end up out here?” he asked.

I shrugged, and started eating—I was hungrier than I thought. “I got some bad news, so I just got in my car and started driving.”

“Following your nose?” he teased. His eyes were a bright blue, and in the daylight I could see he was a little younger than Reeve. He was so wholesomely good looking it made my teeth hurt.

“Something like that.” I gave him a careful smile, which he readily returned. “What’s the story with you and Reeve?” I asked, turning the tables on him.

“We live a few hours away, but this is our place,” he said, giving the glade we were in a look around. “Every month we come out here, but last night Reeve had to close at his shop, so we got a late start—and it was a good thing we did, otherwise no one might’ve found you till morning.”

“I dunno, sleeping in the non-existent backseat of a Maserati might’ve been a little more comfortable than a truck bed,” I teased, and he laughed.

“Tonight you’ll get the tent.”

“No, I’m kidding—”

“I know,” he said, and chuckled, pushing his bangs off his face in a casual motion. “But at the very least, we should take turns.”

I polished off the eggs and set the plate down.God, if I spent another night, listening to them fuck, I’d have to sleep with a canteen bedside me.“So how long have you two been going out?” I said, making it obvious I was trying to look for a ring on his hands.

“Going out?” he asked back, his eyebrows rising. “Wow—uh. I guess that makes sense. But...it’s a little different than that.”

And then I remembered where I was. “Oh. Yeah,” I agreed. “Totally.” For all I knew they had wives and lives, and this was their Brokeback Mountain.

He gave me another grin. “Why don’t you take a nap now, in the tent, while I get everything marinating for dinner?”

“That actually sounds really nice,” I said. My belly was full and I’d only slept for a few hours. And there was something about having run away from all my problems that was making me relaxed. “Is there anything I can do?”

He looked me dead in the eye, and his grin twisted into a hint of a smirk. “Maybe later,” he said, before jerking his chin tent-ward. “But for now—go.”

The whole tent smelled like Reeve—like both of them. There was a thick mattress pad on the ground, and several sleeping bags zipped up atop it, and while I probably should’ve been concerned for black-light reasons—fuck it.I slid between the sleeping bags, tucking my arm beneath my head.

But it turned out being zipped up inside the scene of the crime from last night didn’t make me any less horny. It was like ever since I’d met them my clit had started aching.Jesus.It was a good thing they only wanted to fuck each other. Otherwise, I’d be throwing myself at them.

It wasn’t my fault.I ran my hands up and down my sides, beneath the same sleeping bag they’d fucked in.I just wanted to feel alive.