Page 94 of Dare To Free Us
O’Connell could sense my conflict. “This is the moment where you ask yourself what she is worth to you.”
Everything.
When I woke from my almost death bed I’d told myself no matter what it cost me I’d pay it. But when faced with what O’Connell was offering it wasn’t that simple. Nothing ever is. “I would have stipulations.”
He half grinned, giving me the impression he’d been expecting that.
“You can have the businesses, all of them. The escorts will have to willingly go work for you, I won’t force anyone to work for someone else.” He nodded his head in agreement. “I can’t guarantee Alessio’s loyalty, in all honesty he might pull out as well, but if he chooses to stay in business I will request that you are his priority.” O’Connell scowled at that one but nodded after a moment of deliberation. “And you change the names of Ecstasy and Red.” There was no way I’d let my prized locations change hands and go to shit, tarnishing their name and mine along with it. If they did, at least it would be my name connected to the glory days. “Lastly, I get to keep one of my savings accounts, in order to give my men the means to move on and the ability to put a roof over my family’s head with dignity, not begging for scraps from someone else. I believe my reputation is deserving of that. You want everything, fine, but let me walk out with my pride.”
O’Connell rubbed a hand across the stubble on his chin. “Agreed.” His hand came across the table a little too quick. There was no hiding the way he was chomping at the bit to seal the deal.
I stared at his hand, unable to move. The finality of the situation choked me. Air puffed in and out of my lungs with little benefit. There would be no going back, no changing my mind on any of it. What if I couldn’t make it in a civilian life? What if the calm actually drove me crazy? What it I failed to be what Arianna hoped I could be?
What if I failed to hold onto the change she brought out in me? The want to put the mafia life behind.
Because I had changed. This conversation was proof of it. If several weeks ago someone told me such a deal would be happening I would have laughed in their faces, and now I was one shitty excuse away from taking it.
O’Connell’s hand hung in the air. I reached for it and paused just before my hand settled against his palm. Panic threatened to make me shaky.
Then I saw her, standing in the sunshine as the breeze blew her hair around her face. Arianna looked at me with eyes so golden they sparkled like the sun.
She risked everything to try and change my mind, but she accomplished more than that. She changedme.
Arianna laid our life out on the table and proved that the illusion of what we had was as disappointing as the wax fruit that always looked better than the real thing, but served no real purpose. To pick up that fake apple and take a bite, only to spit it out in disgust, thinking it was going to taste sweet and crisp like the real thing, did more than disappoint. Arianna showed me that no matter how I much I wanted that apple to be real, it would never give me true satisfaction, and our family would never survive on it. My idea of what gives life meaning, changed.
Arianna changed me, freed me. It more than worked, it set us on a path to freedom. She risked everything to better our child’s future, her courage was deserving of every sacrifice.
So, as I settled my hand into O’Connell’s there wasn’t panic, only peace.
“Very good,” he said, keeping his expression neutral out of respect. He knew that handshake cost me more than wealth and power.
But before I dropped his hand I said, “I would appreciate it if I could talk you out of our clothes and personal effects in the house?”
His smile was bright. “You can have your underwear, Matteo,” he answered teasingly. “Just leave me a few of your wife’s artwork and we’ll call it done.”
“Agreed. I’ll call my lawyers and tell them to start drawing up paperwork. I’m sure they can have everything ready by tomorrow morning. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a pressing matter to attend to.” Our hands slipped apart.
“Mind if I ask what that is?”
My entire aura darkened. I might have just agreed to leave the mafia behind and changed to a certain degree, but none of that would save this person from my wrath.
“It’s time for Nico to get his due.”
* * *
The concrete roomwas cold and damp, it smelled of piss and shit and body odor. The single, hanging light in the center of the room didn’t reach more than a dozen feet, leaving the corners and edges of the space in shadow. But it was enough to give center spotlight to the pathetic figure slumped over in the chair.
Vinny had kept Nico in one of the cells below Red, giving him just enough food and water to say alive. The cuts on Nico face from the fight were red and enflamed with infection. Nico’s suit was soiled with days of sweat and urine from when Vinny tuned him up and made him piss himself. He was a mess.
Nico hadn’t made eye contact with me yet. Instead, when Vinny, Steven, I, and a dozen others entered the room he looked to the floor as he was shoved into the chair and restrained. I looked at him and shook my head, wondering how I didn’t see him for what he was years ago.
“Nico,” I hissed. “Look at me you piece of shit.”
For a second he didn’t move but you could see his breathing pick up. When Nico did lift his head I saw he was seconds away from begging.
I made a show of rolling my sleeves up as I said, “Don’t bother begging. Every man in here was once your friend, but your actions caused every one of them to lose someone closer.” He knew what I meant. Many of the men he had killed were family members to some in the room, or had close bonds of friendship like Luca and I. They deserved a front row seat to the show and none of them had an ounce of mercy.
“Matteo, please,” he begged anyway. “Vasilisa got in my head!”