Page 20 of Just Our Secret

Maybe because you were finally touching her tits, and she had her hands halfway down your pants?Yep. I’d been distracted, not thinking quite right. But that made perfect sense and helped the dread over lying a little bit. Keeping this from Liam was to protect him, not to hurt him. It was smart and cautious, and one more way Andi showed she was an amazing mom.

A smile spread slowly across her lips. “So… we’re doing this?”

“I think so.”

She tilted her head. “You think? This is too big a deal to justthink.You either know, or we’re not.”

See? Knows her own mind.And rightly expected me to know mine. And though a fair amount of dread swirled in my gut, it mixed with a healthy dose of anticipation and elation to temper the more negative feeling. “I’m sure. We’re doing this.”

Her smile returned and she wrapped her arms around my neck. Before I could even play at stopping myself, I bent my head and took her mouth. Damn, I didn’t know that I’d ever get over being able to do that whenever I thought about it.

Well, notwheneverif we were keeping it secret. But often. Far more often than the never I’d lived with for years.

My adrenaline spiked, and need pulsed in my gut, but I pulled away. “I want to do so many things to you, you have no idea.”

She licked her lips. “But?”

“But right now, we need to study, or we’re going to be screwed in more ways than one.”

She exhaled and gave me a look like she wasn’t happy about my putting on the brakes again, then turned and walked toward the living room, giving me a perfect view of that fine ass. Before she made it out of the kitchen, she glanced back to catch me staring at her, and bit her lip. With more than a little heat still in her eyes, she said, “Fair enough, Baker. But let it be known, I am absolutely interested in one particular kind of screwing.”

ELEVEN

ANDI

“Nice one, bud,” I called to Liam as he jumped from the moving swing and landed like a frog. He kicked up bits of wood chips when he dashed back to the swing to do it again, and I chuckled when he almost slipped and landed on his face. “Careful.”

“Boo,” Wade said in my ear, making me jump. He laughed, his eyes shining bright as he looked down at me. “Sorry.”

“You scared the crap out of me,” I exclaimed, hand on my rapidly beating heart. Whether it was beating that fast because of the jump-scare or because of the way his dimples flashed when he smiled, I couldn’t be sure.

“Uncle Wade,” Liam yelled from the swing, pumping his legs hard. “Watch this!”

“Okay, let me see it,” he called back.

Liam pumped his legs a few more times, leaning back on the swing to increase his momentum. Then when the time was right, he launched himself into the air and landed in his frog pose with a loud thud, sending wood chips flying.

“Wow,” Wade said, approaching him to give him a high five. “Nicely done, little man. I’m impressed.”

Liam beamed up at him. “Thanks. What are you doing here, anyway?”

I gulped. Wade and I had been sneaking around behind Liam’s and Connor’s backs for two weeks now. We stole kisses at school in dark corners where we knew we wouldn’t be spotted by anyone who cared.

We changed each other’s names in our phones so we could call and text freely, and I had to admit that getting a text from my nameless Psych Partner in front of Connor always gave me a little thrill.

In Wade’s phone, I was Legs. I’d smacked his arm when he’d suggested it, but he’d said it was the perfect way to get Connor to assume he was simply being a douche and not ask questions. I’d almost agreed about the douche part, but then he’d told me how much he loved my legs and wanted to picture them every time I called him. How could I argue with that?

We hadn’t done anything more than kiss since we’d begun our little tryst, but that was good. We were taking it slow. Being practical. I’d told Wade I wanted to take our time because it would make it better when we finally did it.

But even though that was probably true, it wasn’t the only reason. I was also terrified that if we went there too soon, I’d somehow mess this up. I was already scared that the depth of my feelings for Wade were so intense it would scare him away. Adding sex to the mix? Finally making love to him after years of secretly fantasizing about it? It could ruin everything.

What if he thought I was terrible, and it didn’t live up to what he’d imagined in his mind all this time? And I knew he’d imagined it, because he’d told me one night during a particularly steamy sexting session.

I wasn’t worried about the reverse happening. There was no doubt in my mind that making love to Wade would be even better than I’d dreamed. But there was a very real possibility the same couldn’t be said for me.

And the spinning out didn’t stop there. Even if it was the most amazing sex in the world for both of us, what if I did something crazy like tell him I loved him right in the middle of it and it sent him running for the door? The embarrassment. The horror.

So yeah, sex hadn’t been on the table thus far. And it had been fine. But the more I saw him, the more he showed up on random outings with me and my kid, or met me outside class with coffee, or winked at me from across the room when Connor wasn’t looking… the more I wanted to change that.