Page 73 of Out of Reach
Sweating and breathing hard, Hawk kicked off the covers, letting the open air cool them. Jude reached for the box of tissues on the nightstand and wiped up the mess. When they’d settled down again, Hawk scooting closer to the wall, and Jude turning onto his other side to face him, Jude stroked Hawk’s forearm with his finger, head close to his on the pillow.
“Do you really think I could go to school?” he asked uncertainly. The thought hadn’t been far from his mind since Lizzy had mentioned it at dinner.
“Of course,” Hawk said.
“I guess maybe I could get federal help,” Jude said.
“Sure, you can. And if you don’t have enough, I’ll pay for the rest.”
“No, I don’t want that.” He bit his lip, reconsidering. “If I had to use your money, I’d pay you back.”
“If that’s what you want,” Hawk said, grasping Jude’s hand and bringing it to his lips to kiss.
“So…where should I apply?”
Hawk seemed to hesitate. “Are you sure you don’t want to go back to New York?”
Jude didn’t have to think long. “Yes.” He couldn’t go back. He wouldn’t feel safe. But it wasn’t just that—the past four years in the city had shown him that it wasn’t the life he wanted. “I’d be fine staying in Redding. I assume that’s what you’d want.”
“I want what’s best for us,” Hawk said. “We could make other things work out. But there is a nice college in the next town over from Redding. We can look into that.”
Jude kissed Hawk’s arm. “Okay. Let’s do that. What are we going to do tomorrow?”
“Anything you want. I know my parents want us all to go out to dinner, and I think Mom’s making a big breakfast in the morning, but we could plan something for the afternoon.”
“How far away is the place you lived when you were younger?”
“About an hour and a half. Why?”
“I’d love to see where you were born and the school you went to with your brother.”
Unexpected tears smarted Hawk’s eyes. “Really?”
“Of course. I want to know everything about you.”
Hawk’s heart clenched in his chest. “Okay, then. That’s what we’ll do.” He would show Jude everything he could, share everything he remembered. He’d make up for what a shit boyfriend he used to be.
“What are you thinking about?” Jude asked, watching his face.
Hawk only shook his head, unable to put it into words.
Snuggling closer, Jude settled his head on Hawk’s bare shoulder. “Thanks for agreeing to the skating.”
“It was fun,” Hawk said, meaning it. He couldn’t remember having that much fun in a long time. He kissed Jude’s head.
A couple of minutes later, Jude was asleep, but Hawk couldn’t seem to drift off. It felt so strange being in his old bedroom again after so many years. Strange but good.
When fifteen more minutes went by and he still couldn’t drift off, Hawk slipped out of the bed and went downstairs. The house was quiet, but when Hawk turned into the kitchen, the light was on over the stove and his sister sat at the table, eating a piece of pie.
“Hey. What are you doing still up?”
“Same as you,” she said. “I got hungry after sex.”
“Liz!” Hawk made a face. “I don’t want to think of my sister doing…that.”
She laughed. “You do realize I’m older than you—barreling toward forty, even. Did you expect me to still be a virgin?”
“Give me some of that,” Hawk said, sliding her plate toward him. “Mm, God, I’ve missed Mom’s pie.”