Page 61 of Because of Blake

After we’ve eaten, and had a couple glasses of wine, Blake clears our dishes. He starts a game of fetch with Oscar, throwing a ball into the brush before lying down on his side. He pats the ground in front of him, so I lie facing him, both of us propped up on our elbows.

“Thank you,” I say.

“Don’t mention it. I love picnics.”

“No, not the picnic. I mean, this was great, but thank you for everything. This whole summer has been the best.”

His chin raises, and if he wasn’t lying down, he’d probably have perfect posture. “You’re welcome. You know, you’ve made this a great summer for me, too. Sure, I haven’t gotten as much sleep as I used to on the weekends, but it’s been worth it.” He winks at me, and I can’t help but giggle as I blush. Oscar comes back and drops the ball at our feet. Blake sits up to throw it again. “When do the kids come back from camp?”

I sigh contentedly. “I pick them up next Friday.”

His head whips around to look at me, his eyes wide. “Oh, wow, likenextFriday? As in a week from today?”

I nod.

“So this is, like, our last hurrah.”

I laugh. “You make it sound like we’ll never see each other again.”

“Well, I mean, once the kids are back, I’m guessing we won’t be spending as much time together, not to mention less sleepovers.”

Has he given this as much thought as I have? “True. There will be a transition period, for sure. I still have to figure out how I’m going to tell them about us.”

His head jerks back. “You haven’t told them yet?”

“No. I didn’t want to do it through a letter or over the phone while they were at summer camp. This is in-person information. I need to be with them so I can gauge their reactions.”

Blake rubs Oscar’s ears, coaxing him into dropping the ball so Blake can throw it again. This time, it goes sailing. “And how do you think they’ll react?”

“I really don’t know. I mean, they like you a lot. Dylan is always saying how cool Mr. Blake is. But they never met any of the men I went out with. I don’t know how they’ll react to a man in their life again.”

Blake nods as his lips tick back and forth and his eyes dart across the blanket. “And if they don’t take it well? What does that mean for us?” There’s fear in his voice.

“Well, if they’re hesitant, then I guess...” –I look into Blake’s eyes. They’re pleading, begging me not to say it– “I guess we’ll have to move slower. They’ll need time to adjust.”

Blake exhales deeply. “Jesus, give me a heart attack, why don’t you.”

I giggle. “Sorry.” I take his hand in mine. “I’m not about to give you up. If my kids aren’t happy about us dating, they’ll have to learn to live with it.”

Blake leans in and kisses me softly. The kiss continues until it isn’t soft anymore. It grows hungrier by the second as he scoots his body against me. His hands start roaming, as do mine and, suddenly, his lips are kissing other places. My jaw, my neck, trailing the collar of my shirt.

“If this is our last weekend alone, I’m going to have to up my game, aren’t I?” Blake whispers against my neck.

“Yeah, you will, but not here.”

“Why? There’s no one around.” He slides his hand up my leg, settling between my thighs.

I let out a quiet moan at the feeling of his hand massaging me. My head falls to the side, and I find Oscar sitting, waiting patiently for us to acknowledge him. With what little breath I have, I manage to say, “But Oscar is watching.”

Blake laughs, kisses me on the lips, and removes his hand. “I guess I’ll have to take you home first.”

The next morning, I wake up before the sun, an unusual occurrence when Blake spends the night. I can barely make out his face in the dark, but his rhythmic breathing tells me he’s sound asleep. I don’t move a muscle. He doesn’t need to be up when I am.

Lying in bed, my mind picks up our conversation from yesterday. Blake and I listed some big changes coming when the kids get home. I’m mainly worried about them accepting him as my boyfriend, but I think he’s more scared of losing our time together. It’s a valid concern, but not one I’m dreading. We’ll still be able to see each other.

But we won’t be having sex all the time.My heart sinks at the thought.Come on, Maggie. You went without sex for three years; you can handle a break now and then.

As my mind swims with thoughts, I become aware of my toes wiggling. I don’t want to disturb Blake, but lying here is driving my anxiety up the wall.