Page 9 of Dearest Protector

After my experience with Ben Blackwood on the patio of his mother’s house, I very much doubted that there was anything the gorgeous billionairecouldn’tarrange.

However, I wouldn’t exactly say that Benjamin Blackwood was asweetheart.

He was large and in charge, and there was an intensity about him that was downright intimidating.

For some reason I couldn’t really explain, he really didn’t frightenme, but I did find the man incredibly intriguing, which was almost as dangerous as fearing him.

The way I’d met Ben for the first time wasn’t exactly the way I’d wanted to meet one of the important individuals in Katie’s life. The circumstances had been far from ideal, and I hated myself for being so attracted to him. But I couldn’t help it. I might be damaged and pathetic, but I wasn’t dead. What single female wouldn’t react the same way to Ben Blackwood?

Except…Benhadn’tfelt like a stranger to me.

There had been something about his overpowering presence and gruff voice that had been…almost comforting, which was kind of ridiculous.

I’d decided that I felt that way because I saw pictures and interviews with him in the media. Florida journalists seemed to love to feature him almost anywhere. Ben was the face of Blackwood Technologies, and the regional media seemed to love hosting or boasting about one of the most eligible bachelors in the world. It was natural that I’d feel some sense of recognition, right?

No matter what the cause, therewassomething about Ben that was familiar to me, but I couldn’t put a finger on exactly why I’d felt that way.

And…for just an instant, I’d gotten the feeling that he might find me attractive, too, which had been a moment of temporary insanity, not to mention stupidity, on my part.

I’ddefinitelymisinterpreted a few of the things he’d said last night.

It wasn’t even remotely possible that he was attracted to me. Maybe I had done creative work, but I was also a realist.

After thinking about what had happened, I’d come to the conclusion that a few of his comments had probably meant that he really wanted no relationship with me at all in the future.

And I could hardly blame him for that.

“So what did you think of Ben in person?” Katie asked curiously. “You told me before the two of you met that you thought he was hot.”

I nearly spit out the coffee I had in my mouth. I swallowed, and then coughed, before I answered wistfully, “He’s even more ridiculously gorgeous than his pictures in the media.”

Katie grinned. “So you’re attracted to him?”

“Yes. No. Oh hell, what single womanwouldn’tbe attracted to him, Katie?” I asked.

She shrugged. “I’mnot, but I’ve already got the most amazing guy on the planet. It’s hard to believe that I actually thought Ben might be my stalker at one time or that I had a very short infatuation with him. But that was before I met Ian. However, I do still think Ben is the second most amazing guy in the world, and you two would make a great couple.”

I snorted. “I said I foundhimattractive. There’s no chance in hell that Ben Blackwood would ever look at me the first time, much less a second. Let’s get real here. I have absolutely nothing going for me professionally anymore. He’s a handsome billionaire. I’m a woman who can’t pay her rent and has no other job skills except for ballet dancing, which I can’t even do anymore. I’m a physical and emotional mess right now. Even before my accident, I was only passably attractive. Ben Blackwood could have his pick of any supermodel or any gorgeous and successful woman he wanted. Why would you ever think he’d look at someone like me?”

Katie surveyed me carefully. “Is that really what you think? That someone like Ben would never be attracted to you? Ben’s had his chances to date any number of beautiful, successful women, and he hasn’t acted on those opportunities. Don’t underestimate him, Ariel. I think he’s looking for far more than a gorgeous face and a perfect body with big breasts. Furthermore, you’ve always been beautiful, inside and out. Why didn’t I know that your confidence had fallen this low? So low that you can’t see yourself realistically anymore?”

I wanted to tell her that I tried not to look at myself at all anymore because I knew I wouldn’t like the female I saw in the mirror right now.

Instead, I simply shook my head and told her honestly, “I don’t think it’s just my confidence level that’s fallen. My entire being was reflected in my dancing. I feel…lost. I’m not sure who I am without ballet.”

Hell, I didn’t know how to explain how I felt, which was probably why I’d never really discussed it with my best friend.

Since I was in preschool, almost every moment that I wasn’t in school had been consumed by dancing.

Ballet had been my entire life.

My purpose.

My passion.

My reason for living.

“You’re a hell of a lot more than just a ballet dancer,” Katie said fiercely. “And I’m here to help you find out who you are again. You’re the only person who kept me sane while I was going through my father’s death and the whole stalker thing with Ian. Maybe you didn’t feel like you could talk to me because I was going through so much drama myself, and I’m so sorry for that, but I’m herenow, Ariel. I have my head on straight, and I’m deliriously happy. I’d like to see you the same way. Let’s discuss this over breakfast. If you won’t let me help you, at least let me buy you a meal and try to convince you that losing your dancing career didn’t destroy the amazing woman that you are.”